


30 Weeks of Prompts

by PigletWrites



Category: Heavy Rain
Genre: ALL THE FLUFF, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bad Humor, Drabble Collection, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Idiots in Love, M/M, One Word Prompts, Self-Indulgent, Then established relationship, cuz I love these two, no beta we die like men, pre-relationship in first chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2019-08-24 03:41:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 39,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16632239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PigletWrites/pseuds/PigletWrites
Summary: Oneshots/drabbles of varying lenght based on one word prompts!Relevant tags will be in the notes at the beginning of each chapter C:Most chapters in this story are rated M, but there are a few with either a higher or lower rating - Check the tags! ❤️





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> I have been shipping these two idiots for 8 years now and it breaks my heart that there aren't more fanfictions with my favourite cops! So, I figured it was about time I did something to change that, if only just slightly xD  
> Also I am sorry that this is kinda all over the place: I am still a little uncertain with my own writing, not to mention that I am new at writing anything that even seems like smut ^^" Oh welp, I tried!  
> Hope you all enjoy!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word(s): Beginning & Rain.  
> Tags for this chapter: pre-relationship, homophobic language, sexual tension, pinning, making out, dry humping, coming in pants, Blake's potty mouth, admitting to feelings, bad attempt at writing Jayden's accent, ALL THE FLUFF!
> 
> This was supposed to be dramatic and rough but I somehow turned it into fluff instead...

 

**BEGINNING**

 

“FUCK YOU, BLAKE!” he finally snapped, the door to his office slamming behind him. The sound echoed through the otherwise silent precinct, the other officers having come to a startled halt as their argument escalated. Of course it was nearly a daily occurrence by now that the two of them went off on each other, but their colleagues fortunately knew not to get involved.

Huffing out a breath labelled with frustration, Jayden barely had time to take a step towards his desk before the door was slammed open again, Blake grabbing a handful of his hair and throwing him against the nearest wall.

“Oh no,  _Nahman_ , I’m nowhere done with you yet,” the older man hissed in his face, his right hand twisting in the front of Jayden’s shirt until the agent started feeling dizzy. “I’ve had just about enough of your smug fucking attitude. Why don’t you do us both a fucking favour and run your fucking queer ass back to Washington?!”

Jayden glared at Blake, his jaw working in badly suppressed anger and his eyes dark, piercing slits. The other man knew full well that he couldn’t; that the agent had been moved to the station in Philly permanently since he had cracked the Origami Killer case. Something about his transfer being ‘good publicity’ for the FBI, giving them a friendly, competent face outwards, and of course Perry never turned down anything that could boost his and the station’s reputation in a positive way.

“Oh? What’s that? Got nothing to say?” Blake taunted at him in a sing-song voice, his breath hitting Jayden’s face as he moved even closer. His presence was looming, making something in Jayden’s stomach twitch despite the few inches he had on the other in height. “That’s right, because you’re nothing but a fucking bureaucrat! I betcha ain’t even a real agent; pretty boy like you probably sucked a lot of dick to get where you are!”

The sound of cracking bone travelled from Jayden’s fist through his body, settling unpleasantly in his spin. Greedily he sucked air into his lungs as Blake stumbled back, a stream of curses leaving the older male.  
“Shut the fuck up! In case you forgot, Blake, I have more than enough proof to get you suspended!”

With a snarl the lieutenant spun around, shoving his body against Jayden and forcing him back against the wall. “It that a threat, you fucking faggot?”  
The blood that slowly ran down from Blake’s nose made the grimace on his face resemble the cover of a horror film. The sight would have been somewhat comical, if the rush of adrenaline, anger and fear didn’t cause Jayden’s whole body to freeze up. “Why don’t you try me, you psychopathic asshole?”

Jayden barely even registered the movement as his own at first, his mind too clouded by boiling warmth. When Blake had brought his face even closer with a snarl, the younger male had acted instinctively, ready to do just about anything to shut the other up and gain the upper hand in their confrontation.

He was just as shocked as Blake at first both men starring into each other’s eyes in shock as they jerkily pulled apart, dark blue striking into light teal.

A small huff of air left Jayden as he pushed his body back against the wall again, trying to prepare for the hit he knew had to be coming.  _Shit! Fuck, why the hell did I do that?!_  He cursed and scolded himself internally, raising his hands up next to his head in the universal sign of surrender. He... He had pressed his lips- ... With any luck this display of submission would be enough to satisfy Blake, letting him off with only a few punches and harsh words.

What the hell had he even been thinking?! But that was just it, the analytical part of his brain concluded; he hadn’t been thinking. What did that mean? He felt uncharacteristically lost as his analysis of his own behavior came out inconclusive.

Blake had remained unmoving, his eyes still fixated on Jayden’s own. Not for the first time Jayden wished that he could just shrink and disappear from the situation completely. It was no wonder that Blake had been promoted to lieutenant. While he could hardly be called a good detective; his methods downright illegal and violent, his unyielding gaze pinned Jayden in place, slowly reading him as his eyes tore deeper and deeper through his mind. A sense of dread crept through the agent’s arms and into his neck, his mind running hopelessly in circles.

It took an embarrassing amount of energy to force his eyes closed. He tried to prepare himself for the first hit, willing his body to relax as much as possible in an effort to, hopefully, not break anything. It didn’t help his mind slow down though, his psychology degree refusing to let the subject of what he had just done be.

He had been under a bit of stress lately. The tension and anger in his body simply needed an outlet and thus in the heat of the argument his body had reacted on pure instinct, seeking a form of release. It wasn’t unlikely: First there was how frustrated the FBI treating him like nothing but a glorified poster boy had made him and then he had been sent here of all places; straight back to a group of people who had made it very clear how displeased they were by his presence.

The bile had risen in his throat the second he saw the new letters that had been added to the door of his office: Norman Jayden, crime scene analyst and criminal psychologist.

Treacherously his mind added, that technically he had been under a lot more stress during the OK case, and back then he sure would have been more likely to spit in Blake’s bastard-face rather than even think of kissing him.

Furthermore, he really should focus on how to retaliate, and how to possibly win, the ensuing fight rather than-

With his eyes closed and his mind still in a daze, he didn’t hear Blake take a step closer. What he did notice, however, was the heat that radiated off the other male’s body, Jayden throwing his eyes open in a weird mixture of alarm and anticipation. His hands had left their positions in the air in responds to the other’s warmth, now resting against the front of Blake’s shirt.

He fought to suppress the shudder than ran through him, as Blake forced him even further up against the wall; the coolness of the bricks a sharp contrast to the burning heat of the lieutenant’s body. He felt cold, his grasp on the fabric of Blake’s shirt slowly growing firmer, his hands tugging the other closer on their own accord.

Once again his mind scolded him, demanding that he stopped this fooling around instantly. This was Blake! Carter fucking Blake, the biggest asshole he had ever met.

Willing a deep breath out through his nose, he lifted his gaze towards the other, ready to pin the other male with what he hoped would be an accusing glare. “Just what do you-“

The words died breathlessly on his lips, Blake’s deep blue eyes so much closer than he had expected. A calloused hand grabbed at the locks of his brown hair, a small, confused sound leaving the agent as he felt himself being yanked forwards.

For a moment everything came to a stop. The sound of the precinct on the other side of the office door died down, the soft rush of cars passing by the station outside fading to a steady, flowing rhythm. The sound of his heart was overwhelming, seemingly echoing in the air around them.

Jayden sighed weakly against Blake’s chapped lips, feeling his thoughts be consumed by those eager lips and the ticklish sensation of Blake’s goatee. A small part of him wanted to pull back and escape, warning him that this was only some part of a sadistic plan, designed to give the lieutenant something he could torment him with later.

He had nearly made up his mind to push the other away, when Blake caught his bottom lip between his teeth, nibbling and licking at the sensitive skin. Small sparks of electricity flooded through Jayden’s body, his hands shooting up and tangling in Blake’s hair. The newfound sense of want that rushed through his body was surprising even to himself: He had of course been lost in the thorns of passion before, but this time it was different. The tingling sensation in his skin and the way his skin burned wherever he and the older man touched, seemed to indicate... Something else than just simply horniness. Was it the result of their power struggle?

He would worry about the indications and consequences later, he told himself absentmindedly, only able to truly focus on how his lips and tongue were roughly claimed as soon as Blake felt him giving in. The taste of coffee, cigarettes and something that had to simply be  _Blake_  engulfed his senses.

“C-Cartah,” he gasped as they briefly parted for air, heat shooting up into his cheeks as his Bostonian accent came out thick and slightly slurred. A deep rumble sounded from the other male’s chest in reply, the tongue in his mouth thrusting forwards against his own, running along the roof of his mouth. Jayden fought weakly against the need to buck his hips, the last of his resolve dissipating as Blake continued to assault his lips.

The friction created between their grinding bodies caused both of their breaths to hitch. The agent had to bite the inside of his cheek to suppress a jolt when Blake’s warm hands left his hair, instead grabbing tightly at his hips and pushing their lower bodies even closer together, effectively eliminating the last remaining space between them.

Blake’s thumb pushed harshly into the crease of Jayden’s hip bone, a small voice in the back of Jayden’s mind registering that the grip was sure to leave marks afterwards. He would later be embarrassed by the hoarse sound that left him at the thought; breathless, high pitched and downright  _needy_. He felt how the shiver that ran through him transfer to Blake’s body too, his hands twisting further into the dark strands of hair.

His entire body twitched like a live wire as he allowed his hips to be guided against Blake’s own. The warmth in his groin had turned into an uncomfortable strain, his member hardening all too eagerly against the other male’s ministrations. He didn’t even try to muffle the keening sound that spilled from his lips as the hardness in his pants slid up against Blake’s thigh, the momentary relieve enough to make him buck his hips against the other with increasing urgency.

Jayden hadn’t even noticed that he had spread his legs to allow the other closer, a stab of shame twisting in his gut. As if he felt the other’s hesitation, Blake broke their heated kiss and instead attacked the younger’s neck, biting and licking at the sensitive skin.

A whine left the agent after a while, the slow grinding of their hips making him feel dizzy with want. Yet it wasn’t nearly enough, the heat in his body coiling until it was nearly painful, the need to have the other closer still drowning out everything else. His limbs shook slightly as he hooked his calves around Blake's lower legs, gasping as he immediately was rewarded with Blake’s member finally sliding fully against his own.

The friction was enough to make him moan out somewhat drunkenly from pleasure. With cheeks that burned with shame he realized that he was getting dangerously close to coming already, his body twitching and shuddering in pleasure as Blake held him tight. Hearing his moan made the lieutenant grunt deeply in return, his hands sliding from Jayden’s hip and down to his ass, kneading and caressing the sensitive skin.

Blake sped up their movements, Jayden’s head falling back against the wall with another loud moan. A small voice in the back of his mind urged him to be quiet, but he was far too tangled up in desire to care at this point. “Cartah- Cartah please-“ he babbled mindlessly, not even sure exactly what he was asking for except just more.

Blake moaned and growled against the crook of Jayden’s neck, his voice breathless and thick with desire. All it took were a few more thrusts and Jayden came undone in the lieutenant’s arms, sobbing in bliss as he finally came. His cum stained the inside of his boxers, the warm and wet liquid against his skin making him shudder. With a last thrust Blake followed him over the edge, his groan broken and choked as his body rode out the waves of pleasure.

Jayden sighed softly as Blake pulled away from his neck both of them still panting for air. For the first time since they began their eyes met, and Jayden was suddenly struck with the reality of the situation. He had kissed Carter Blake. And Blake had kissed him back.

Blake seemed to come to the same realization as a stunned silence stretched between them. The longer it lasted, the more suppressed questions and mute realizations formed.  _He had kissed Carter Blake_ , and they had ki-  _made out_  in his office. They had been-  _They had rubbed against each other. Against the wall. Carter fucking Blake._

Jayden opened his mouth to speak, finally, but before he could even draw in a breath Blake had let go of him and stormed out of his office. Remaining slumped against the wall in silence, the agent looked after the lieutenant as he stormed out of the station. Ash and a few of the other officers cast a few curious glances after Blake and then back at Jayden before the door finally swung shut again.

Jayden silently hoped that they didn’t notice the state of his appearance; clothes messy, lips swollen and cheeks red.

 

 *

In the following days nothing else happened. Both men were avoiding the other as much as possible when they weren’t called out to investigate a crime scene together or put on a stakeout. Jayden remained dumbfounded; continuously confused as to how the bizarre situation had even come to happen in the first place. _Wonder if it might have been you kissing him, huh?_ His mind mocked. It made Jayden desperate for a cup of coffee, even if the liquid asphalt that the precinct disrespectfully called by that name would kill him upon the first sip.

_Oh,_ _Great Norman_ , his mind continued; _you get a new start without ARI, without tripto, and you decide that the best cause of action is to kiss the station’s very own psychopathic narcissist?! And let’s not forget that you hate the guy! What the hell were you thinking?!_

He honestly didn’t know. He supposed that it had been quite a while since he had been romantically involved with anyone, or even just intimate with anyone for that matter… But he hadn’t thought of that as a problem. If he needed to get off he could easily take care of it on his own. It was both easier and less messy that way, and it allowed him to focus solely on his job and not an angry boyfriend.

It was nothing but his instincts reacting to an uncomfortable situation and that was all; it was a complete coincidence that Blake just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Yes, he would rise above this incident. He was a proficient and skilled agent. He had no feelings or anything of the like for Carter Blake. He would pretend that it never happened and go back to working together as professionals.

Though the other _had_ kissed him back. It was all too easy for him to recall the feeling of Blake’s lips against his own, the flavour of his tongue somehow still haunting his taste buds. He had really liked the taste. Plus, the man was quite handsome in his own jagged, menacing way. Of course he was still a fucking bastard who thought his badge gave him the right to terrorize people left and right, and-

“Jayden,” said man’s voice suddenly cut through his thoughts, making the agent jump in his chair. He hadn’t heard the door to his office open and scrambling to try and safe face from his obvious daydreaming, he curtly turned all of his attention to the half-finished report on his computer. His reaction caused Blake to raise an eyebrow, looking unimpressed and on the verge of saying something before he simply shook his head. “Get up asshole we’ve got shit to do.”

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a blur as Jayden focused on doing his work. The crime scene they had been called out to was an absolute mess; the rain had done its work in destroying most of the possible clues on the ground, and the place was already swimming with journalists. The rain and the flashing of cameras hadn’t really done much to lift Jayden’s already somewhat awkward and agitated mood. The only morbidly positive thing was that the victim was easily identifiable and the whole thing was easily determined to be the outcome of a clash between two rival gangs.

Blake quickly got the small team of officers organised and the whole place had been searched in a matter of an hour. Securing the premise and making sure that someone stayed behind to keep civilians out, Blake slowly turned on his heel and stalked back towards their car with a snort. Jayden hesitated for a while, watching the dark outline of the lieutenant’s back against the shifting bright lights from the police cruisers.

Briefly Jayden was reminded of a page in a comic book. The view looked ridiculously fictitious in its stylistic setup; it was almost a shame that he didn’t have ARI anymore to record it. At the thought of ARI his already less than great mood worsened considerably. He shouldn’t be thinking like that. Getting rid of ARI (and tripto) was the right decision. The OK case had shown him just how dangerous the device actually was, and his body and mind was still recovering from the strain. He still had trouble remembering mundane things sometimes: The day before he had looked at the large clock in the station, for an embarrassingly long moment completely unable to recognize what the hands where showing. 

“Shit, this is gonna take ages to clear up. Fucking paperwork-,” he overheard Blake mumble indignantly to himself as the older male practically let himself fall into the car, “fucking waste of fucking time.” Jayden said nothing as he climbed into the passenger seat but he did struggle with keeping a slight smile off his face.  
“The fuck are you smirking at?” Blake bit in a monotone voice as he pulled the car back out onto the road and into the slow moving traffic.   
“Nothing,” Jayden answered a bit too quickly, leaning back in his seat. At least this was an improvement from the drive to the scene: They hadn’t said a single word to one another then, not even the voice of the enthusiastic radio host enough to fill the silence. “I was just thinking that this is exactly like you.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Someone died and you are bitching about paperwork.”  
“What? You want me to break down in tears, Jayden?”  
“Oh no, if you did I fear you would lose all of your pent-up rage. If that were to happen you might even become somewhat pleasant.”  
The banter did earn him a slight huff from Blake, the sound laced with humour as it escaped through his nose, “I love ya too, Jayden.”

 It was said in a high-pitched, theatrical voice that clearly meant to mock him, but even so the words caused heat to spread across Jayden’s body. Immediately he was back against the wall of his office, his body hungry with longing and Blake between his tights. Cursing inwardly Jayden had to finally admit it to himself: He wanted it to happen again. The memory of sensations and touches assaulted his mind, rough, calloused phantom hands roaming across his back and grabbing his behind.

His mind half-heartedly tried and failed to come up with a reply. The stretched out silence caused Blake to shift his gaze from the road, eyes taking in the stunned and clearly nervous agent next to him.

“Oh hell- That- Don’t you get any ideas, fag! You were the one who threw yourself at me I just happened to be horny and figured I might as well screw around with you, since you wanted it so bad.”  
“You were the one who started touching _me_ ,” Jayden argued back, cheeks turning purple as anger flared through him, “The kiss was simply an attempt to throw you auff so you’d get auut auf my face.” He pulled a face as his accent came out thicker and thicker as the sentence progressed, hated how it slurred his speech when he was upset.

“Fuck off, you were the one who kept moaning my name like a cheap slut,” Blake growled back through clenched teeth, his grip on the steering wheel tightening.  
“You were the aune who liked it!” Jayden yelled back, voice rising as he grew ever more agitated. With gritted teeth he sneered at Blake, lowering his voice and willing his mouth to form each word slowly, “as I recall you came too, so just who’s the _faggot_ of the two of us, hmm?”

Jayden whelped out sharply as Blake suddenly floored the break. The seatbelt caught around his middle, temporarily knocking the air from his lungs as it did its job in keeping him from going through the windshield. The car skirted through the crossroads and turned down a byway, the streetlamps unlit even though it had already gotten dark out. It took a while for Jayden to regain his ability to speak, his body still buzzing with adrenaline and his lungs greedily sucking in air, “Jesus, Blake! What th-“  

 The lieutenant parked the car along the road once again breaking a bit too roughly before turning the engine off. Jayden’s heart sped up in his chest, a sickly feeling of anxiety causing cold sweat to gather at his neck. “One more word out of your mouth,” Blake said in an eerily levelled voice, slowly turning in his seat so his front was towards Jayden, “and I’ll really shoot you in the face this time.”

Once again silence settled between them, Blake turning back towards the road and leaning back in his seat. He didn’t start the car though. Rain drops created a waterfall against the windscreen, the drops idly sliding down only to be swallowed up by the rest of the flood and gaining speed in their common descend. Humid cold kept in through the bodywork, steel cooling and fabric turning damp. It made Jayden pull his jacket further up around his ears.   

His mind worked through various replies and options, but none seemed to quite be right in this particular situation. Next to him Blake hadn’t moved an inch, the lieutenant’s body stiff and tense. After a while the drumming of rain on the roof of the car became oddly soothing. Jayden still hated the constant downpour, but sitting right here, he found his dislike for the phenomenon diminish slightly. Perhaps he was being a fool, but in that moment he decided to just let his thoughts stand still for a time, his mouth taking over without a second thought.

“You forgot your gun back at the station. It’s on your desk,” he mumbled softly into the damp stillness of the car. He kept his eyes pointing straight forwards, following the drops on the glass.  
“I know,” came the muttered reply, Blake voice cracking slightly in what Jayden identified as either confusion or embarrassment. Perhaps it was both. “You got lucky this time…”   

Tentatively the younger moved his gaze from the window and settled on Blake. The other’s face was twisted in a grimace, brows furrowed and the edges of his mouth pointing downwards. For a second Jayden could have sworn that his cheeks seemed darker than usual. Or was it just the rain being reflected in the window? Feeling like he was intruding on something private, Norman quickly averted his gaze again. His abdomen tightened slightly, and for a brief moment he wondered if perhaps he had crossed a line.

“Let’s get back,” Blake sighed and reached for the key. Before he could turn it in the ignition, however, Jayden allowed himself to follow the urge in his body and stopped him. Placing his hand on top of Blake’s he experimentally let his fingers graze against the smooth skin of the back, touch gentle and light, ready to quickly retreat in case the other lashed out.

Both men stared transfixed at their hands, fingers shaking slightly as they continued to touch. The back of Blake’s hand was soft in contrast to how callouses and rough patches lined his palm and the underside of his fingers. The skin was littered with small scars. Some had obviously come from cooking, the image of Blake wearing an apron making Jayden chuckle slightly.

The older male huffed, withdrawing his hand slightly before he slid it firmly against Jayden’s, intertwining their fingers. The gesture was so intimate, bordering on romantic, that Norman felt his throat go dry. They had to both be blushing like two pre-teens.

“I’m not gay,” Blake said firmly, his voice back to his normal demanding and rough tone, “I just… happen to like your ass is all.” The only reply that Jayden was able to muster was a gentle squeeze and his teeth digging into his own lower lip timidly.


	2. Pale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word 2: Pale  
> I know the topic of Jayden being pale is a cliché, but I'm a sucker for fluff and couldn't help it C: Also, this somehow turned into a kind of character-study of Blake, or at least his feelings for Norman. 
> 
> Tags for this chapter: Fluff, possessiveness, mentions of abuse but very brief!, Blake is in love and it's weird for him, body worship? I think?  
> Enjoy! <3  
> 

 

**PALE**

 

Jayden was like a painting. At least that was the conclusion that Blake had reached after quite a few mornings with the sleeping agent lying next to him in his bed. 

He wasn’t exactly well-versed in most aspects of high culture, art especially being a topic that had never quite interested him, but he liked to think that he was slowly starting to understand exactly what the critiques, and those opulent ass-hats that frequented galleries and the like, meant when they talked about ‘depth’.

No one could disagree that Jayden was pale. His skin was constantly shifting between being completely whitish beige and sickly yellow, the almost constant bags under his eyes only making the colours stand out more. However, if one had an opportunity to look closer and _really_ look, a whole array of colours swam around in Jayden’s skin. Of course Blake had no intension of letting anyone be that near to Norman except himself, but that was beside the point.

With a sigh Blake buried his face into his pillow, feeling disgusted with himself for being such a sappy shit. He had never been good with these kinds of things, as the few girlfriends he had had in the past had reminded him, but with Jayden it somehow came easier. Still feeling gruff from sleep the lieutenant glared at said male: The kid slept like a goddamn koala, curled up in the blankets and completely gone to the world.

It was difficult to fight against the urge to shove the agent out of bed, just to see the anger rise up in those round cheeks. Anger was one of the few things that could make Norman’s skin look almost human. It was one of the many reasons why Blake enjoyed pissing the other off so much, though he would never admit to that.

Instead he settled for letting his eyes trace along the blue veins that showed through the pastel skin at the younger’s left collarbone. They caressed the up-climb longingly before plunging down into the valley beyond the bone, the blue colour shifting as the veins rose up and duck down.

He followed it up the slope of Jayden’s neck, the light blue disappearing several places under clouds of possessive red along the way. It made the lieutenant have to bite back a chuckle. The agent would give him hell once he woke up, moaning about not being able to fully cover up all the marks before work. Blake didn’t give a damn though. Jayden was his; what did it matter if other people knew that too? If anything it might help fight off a few of the female officers’ sad attempts at flirting with the agent, not to mention the odd witness they had to interrogate.

The last one in particular had been hard to swallow: The young  man had practically bend himself over the goddamn table to get closer to Jayden, eyes constantly on him in a lazy gaze that was probably meant to be sexy. It hadn’t exactly helped on his foul mood either, that the kid had ignored all of his questions only answering the agent in a way where the guy managed to sneak in a bit too much of personal information about himself. Him being single for instance.

Blake had almost felt bad about taking his frustrations out on Jayden later, but that slight guilt had only lasted until the younger male was thrown over his desk, moans ringing in the lieutenant’s ears.

Why in the world had Blake denied himself this for so long? After their first, clumsy encounter in Jayden’s office he had made a point of ignoring the younger to the best of his abilities; rubbing shit in his face whenever an opportunity arose and seeking out even more fights than usual. He had been confused to the point of distress, disgusted with his desires and desperate to ascertain his dominance.

Back then he had been terrified of the prospect of anyone knowing how much he wanted Jayden. Now it was almost the opposite, a weird need to show him around and make sure that no one dared to even try to get a look at what was for his eyes only.

Dwelling on these thoughts his eyes slid further up the expanse of Jayden’s neck, following the largest, purple vein as it snuck up behind the other’s ear. He didn’t have to look to know, that it settled right at the spot that made Jayden gasp in anticipation whenever he kissed or bit into it.

From there the vein disappeared again, Blake’s gaze instead shifting to the mess of brown hair. Jayden was always so particular when it came to his appearance, his hair especially; always gelled and brushed back. He never understood why Jayden bothered, but he figured it probably had something to do with his wish to look as professional as possible, same as when he hid Blake’s marks.  

The agent was trying to hide it, but it was painfully obvious to Blake how uncertain the younger man actually was. A small huff left him, barely muffled by half of his face still being buried in his pillow. Jayden was still such a kid.

He hadn’t believed him at first when Jayden had told him that he was in his mid-thirties, and though Blake now noticed the slight wrinkles around the other’s eyes and forehead, he still looked way younger than he actually was. Arguably, it might be partly due to Jayden’s hair in that very moment; free from product, slightly curly in places and completely tussled from their passionate love making the night before. He looked gorgeous.

Feeling heat rise to his cheeks, Blake buried his face fully in the pillow again, thankful that Jayden was still asleep. Geez, when exactly did he get like this? Did people become corny with old age? If so he was definitely going to throw Jayden out before it got out of hand! Although, even as he told himself that, he knew full well that it was a lie.

“For fucks sake,” he muttered against the cotton of the pillowcase, dryly wishing that his body would obey his thoughts and let him throw up at his own sentimentality. Tenaciously he threw his pillow down onto the floor, turning fully in bed so that he was facing the agent. It felt like an insult when his chest tightened, his eyes once again finding Jayden’s face with a feeling of awe.

His face was unguarded and relaxed, jaw hanging slightly open and eyelashes resting against the top of his cheeks. Lying like this the various shades of colour showed clearly on his face: The dusting of pale freckles was almost invisible even now. His skin had taken on a lot healthier, rosy undertone ever since he moved in with Blake, the older taking pride in knowing that it was thanks to his effort of stuffing food into the other’s face. No wonder the kid had looked like a dead man walking when he forgot to eat!

The skin below his high cheekbones were slightly pink in colour, the light tone shining through the fair tint and making him look like a less exaggerated version of the painted cherubs he had seen on a few church walls. Lips were peach like in colour rather than blue, the circles under his eyes now a light brown as opposed to the aggressive black.

He was lying on his side, his face poking up from the bundle of blankets and limbs. The sight reminded Blake of a hedgehog hibernating. He bet the younger also had his legs curled up and pressed into his chest. On further inspection he found his guess to be true.

“Just like a kid,” he muttered into the stillness around them, reminded of how the covers had been the only thing keeping him safe from the monster under his bed during his childhood. Of course he later found out that the monsters were other people, and that the most effective way of dealing with them, was to already be lurking under the bed before they even arrived. Such a childish notion, really: As if blankets, duvets and pillows were somehow equal to thick stone walls and metal shields, rather than just fabric and stuffing made to bring warmth.

He suddenly found himself wondering what exactly had made Jayden want to become an agent. As far as Blake himself was concerned, the path to police officer had seemed pretty much set in stone from the very beginning; from the first time his stepfather hit his little sister and their mother failed to do anything.

For years he had been his sister’s blanket. Whenever his sister would accidentally evoke the wrath of _that man_ , Blake would go out of his way to do something even worse, effectively shifting the focus and punishment to himself. _Jayden could probably write a fucking novel about that_ , he huffed to himself, a slight smile on his face.

He highly doubted the younger male had had an upbringing that was anything like that; his very posture, smugness and need to be right practically screamed ‘beloved and spoiled only child’. Jayden had probably been a really happy brat too.

The smile of his face widened slightly at the thought, trying to picture exactly how the other might have looked at the age of 5, 8 and 12. If they had somehow been able to meet while being the same age, Blake was sure that he would have hated the other’s guts even then. Such a stuck-up son of a bitch… But really cute though.  

Cursing at his own returning sappiness, Blake decided to hurry out of bed before he made himself feel even more disgusted. 


	3. Crush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word 3: Crush  
> This chapter takes place about a week after the first C:  
> Also this chapter is rated E! So for those of you who would rather avoid badly written smut, you are free to skip this xD  
> Tags for this chapter: Wet dreams, dirty talk, smut, car sex, anal fingering, anal sex, rough anal sex, light dom/sub, praise kink, slight degradation, public sex, semi-public sex, possessiveness
> 
> I tried... Smut is my enemy #1  
> First time writting anything E rated, so enjoy this smutty train wreck xD  
> 

 

**CRUSH**

 

_“Fuck! Norm-Mhmm!” Blake’s voice caused a shiver to rush through his body. Mewling softly against the hard flesh in his mouth Jayden sucked harder, eagerly dragging the foreskin back and forth over the glands, the organ pulsing with each downwards stroke of his lips._

_The taste of precum dominated his tongue already, the distinct flavour only growing more and more intense as he continued. It was almost hard for him to breath, a desperate urge to take the other man as deep as he possibly could currently winning over his need for air. Arousal and musk mixed around him, causing his own body to heat up, his skin coiling downwards into his abdomen and groin. Time had slowed to a near stop around him, Jayden only truly existing in the feeling of velvet skin sliding in and out of his mouth._

_Above him another groan left Blake’s mouth, the fingers in Jayden’s hair tightening their hold. “So good, so good for me. Fuck I love seeing you like this-! So good at sucking my cock.” The gasped words of praise caused Jayden to moan weakly, his knees trembling with want._

_Relaxing his throat he allowed the other to guide his head back and forth, Blake’s member sliding in as far as it could go in harsh, sharp thrusts. He pressed his tongue flat against one of the thick veins, feeling how the organ twitched, before sliding his tongue around the head next time Blake guided him up, carefully sliding the tip against the slit._

_The moan rung in his ears, and his own member pressed against the fabric of his pants in reply, begging to be touched. He felt the familiar sting of pride rush through his cheeks, the fact that he was able to pleasure the older man so well incredibly satisfying in its own right. It wasn’t enough, however._

_The heat kept coiling and spreading through his body, his abdomen tightening until it was nearly painful. If he hadn’t been so far gone listening to Blake’s sounds and the wet, slick noises that filled the room around them, he would have been embarrassed of how needy he was acting. He wanted to taste the man, have him claim his mouth first and then his body, fill him up wi-_

A harsh tap on the window next to his head caused him to sit straight up with a yelp. Disoriented and dizzy it took a moment for him to recognize the street in front of him, reality slowly returning to him.  
“I’m gone for two fucking minutes and you fall asleep? God damnit, how did you ever become an agent?” Blake mumbled with no real venom in his voice as he sat back into the driver seat, handing Jayden a warm paper cup.  He accepted it thankfully, feeling how his cheeks heated up as he shifted in his seat. He was half hard. _Why this is just great Norman!_

After that first initial encounter, nothing else had really happened between the two of them. They still fought almost as roughly as they used to, although there was little hatred behind the harsh words anymore, and overall they were much more relaxed, happy almost, in the other’s company. They hadn’t, however, been physical with each other. At all. No kissing, no holding each other, hands touching… no sex. Jayden was a bit ashamed to admit that it bugged him. Not for any particular cause, he added to himself, it was simply just his sex drive. _Oh, you mean that none existent sex drive that you usually have? Sure thing!_ Next to the withdrawals making him feel like shit, him getting into such good ‘contact’ with his thoughts were definitely another part of his experimentation with ARI that he hated.

It certainly didn’t help that he had been having these dreams nearly every night, either. At least Blake hadn’t seemed to notice anything, which was extremely lucky on his part. Normally it was impossible to hide anything from the other.

Burying his face in his cup he took a careful sip, thankful to find the coffee black and strong. Feeling comfortable hiding his face for a while, Jayden tried to focus his mind on the street before them and their target, however he kept coming back to the feeling of rough hands in his hair, groaned words and thickness in his mouth.

He wondered what the other looked like. From a stereotypical point, one reason behind Blake’s excessive use of violence could indicate that he was compensating for some aspect of his manhood, but one could never really know for sure. Either way, he wondered how it would feel to have him in his hands or rubbing against his tongue, or-or inside of him.

Shit just what was wrong with him? He couldn’t remember being like this before, not even as a horny teenager! Did something about Blake really turn him on so much? He had tried not to think about everything that had transpired between them, opting to simply just let it continue on and see where he ended up. The truth was that the whole thing made him feel nervous, uncertain. It had all happened so fast after all. What exactly was this thing between them? Was it sexual? Was it a relationship? Both? He wanted to ask Carter, but he was afraid to know the answer. Like this he could live in blissful unawareness and simply take things as they came… Or at least he would be able to, if he wasn’t _himself_ ; the person with a psychology degree and an unhealthy curiosity.

“Jesus, kid! Don’t fall asleep on me,” Blake huffed next to him, leaning against the steering wheel with his own cup, “at least put the coffee down first so you don’t spill it all on me.”  
“Oh? You don’t appreciate when things get a little heated?” he shot back teasingly, wiggling his eyebrows at the other to underline his words.

Blake laughed fully at that. No huffing, puffing or grunting. He laughed; loud and sincerely. For a moment Jayden completely forgot about anything else, instead watching the way Blake’s face squinted in amusement. The lieutenant’s dark blue eyes shone with warmth, the usual scrutinizing and cunning glimmer of mischief replaced by simply humour. It made Jayden’s throat seem oddly tight, a fluttering sensation settling in his stomach.

“You think you can handle my kind of heat?” Blake asked him once the worst of his laughing fit had subsided, his eyes still holding that glimmer of playfulness, “it might be better for you to get that beauty sleep of yours first, if ya really wanna play.”  

The words made Jayden shiver visibly, a shock of electric warmth rushing down along his spine.  
“Are you trying to say that you think I’m beautiful, _Cartah_?” he asked, pinning the other with a soft gaze. He tilted his head downwards slightly, just enough so that he was looking at Blake through his eyelashes. The whole exchange caused the fluttering in his body to get worse, a certain pressure seeking down, down, _down_ into his groin and hips.

“No, why do you think you need the beauty sleep?” Blake huffed out in amusement, glancing at Jayden through the corner of his eye. Jayden gasped in mock offense, reaching over the centre console to hit the older male’s shoulder. Instead he felt a firm grip on his wrist before he was yanked to the side, the gear shift digging into his side. Any sound of discomfort that might have left him was muffled by Blake’s lips settling over his own.

The kiss was rough; their mouths clashing together in a mix of teeth and tongue, smooth lips firmly locked with chapped ones. The angle was awkward, Jayden’s head pulled back while Blake had to lean down. If anything it seemed to only make the kiss more passionate, the lieutenant’s coarse beard scratching against Jayden’s chin, and the younger humming in appreciation.

When they had to pull apart for air, Jayden immediately got lost in Blake’s eyes, blue turned dark with an underlying fire that Jayden’s hadn’t seen in the other’s face before. Last time happened so suddenly that he completely forgot to notice the look on the other’s face. 

Jayden resumed the kiss with eager enthusiasm, tongues twisting together and hands roaming against Blake’s chest. The whole thing stirred his member once again, feeling it twitch in his pants. He was unsure how exactly he managed it, but he quickly found himself sitting in Blake’s lap, straddling his tights despite the small space.

The air in the car turned thick, the headiness of need surrounding them intoxicating. Jayden felt drunk, the feeling of Blake underneath his fingers and tights so much better than any high tripto and ARI had ever given him.  
“Aren’t ya eager,” Blake growled, letting his beard scrape against Jayden’s neck before he bit down into his shoulder. Even through his jacket and shirt he could still feel the slight dents of teeth against his skin. “And we are even in public. So shameless.” The whispered words were answered with a shaky moan. 

They were parked in a relatively quiet neighbourhood and the streets were mostly empty as the evening bled into night, but there were still a few people lingering around or on their way home. Shudders wrecked through Jayden’s body, the agent whining as he pressed himself even closer to the other man. “Heh, did that turn ya on?” Blake purred in a smug tone, hands opening Jayden’s jacket and throwing it somewhere in the car behind them.

Jayden gasped and tensed in anticipation when Blake roughly pulled his shirt off immediately after. Cold air hit his heated skin and made goosebumps spread along his arms, the coolness only high-lightening the warmth of Blake against him.

They kissed again like they were starving, Jayden’s hands shaking and he began unbuttoning Blake’s shirt, not even bothering with tearing off his open jacket. His fingers were met with a hard chest, defined muscles right under a slight layer of fat. A soft patch of chest hair spread against his pecs, slowly trailing down his stomach before it disappeared into his pants.

Licking his lips he slowly let his hand follow the trail, stroking against soft skin, muscles and scar tissue. His breath hitched against Blake’s lips when he reached his pants, Jayden’s fingers eagerly rubbing against the older male’s tights. He was so lost in exploring, that he didn’t notice Blake watching his face with a smirk.

His breath hitched as Blake reached up and teased a nipple, pinching the pink nub between his fingers. Eagerly Jayden leaned further into the touch, his own hands rubbing against Blake’s tights with more force, hastily tugging the lieutenant’s belt off and throwing it carelessly into the backseat. He reached for the fly, but before he could tug it down, the fingers on his chest were replaced by a hot mouth, Blake biting down roughly on the sensitive flesh. A mixture of pain and pleasure rushed downwards through Jayden’s body, his abs quivering in lust. With a held breath he scrambled to open the other’s fly, sneaking his hand inside the waistband of the man’s underwear.

He was a lot bigger than he had imagined. So much for the compensation theory. His already dry mouth felt like a desert, his eyes glued downwards as he watched his hand slowly work up and down along Blake’s length. A deep sigh left the other, only fuelling the fire in Jayden’s lower stomach. This was hardly the first time he had seen another man naked, but something about it being _Blake_ made the whole experience feel new.

A lot sooner than he would have liked, his hand was pulled away. Whining softly in protest the sound turned to a loud gasp as the seat was suddenly pushed back as far as it could go, causing Jayden’s hips to shift forwards with the seat, while his back remained leaned against the steering wheel. He had barely a second to react before Blake’s hands were all over him, roaming the expanse of his chest greedily before pushing his pants down around his hips.

Blake mumbled something inaudible about the agent being too thin, but Jayden didn’t catch his exact words before the man’s fingers had been shoved into his mouth. Understanding what the other wanted, Jayden wasted no time in swirling his tongue around the digits, making sure to coat them generously in his saliva. They were pulled from his mouth with a wet pop, and then one of Blake’s thumbs was roughly shoved into him, buried to the first knuckle.

Jayden jolted, body unsure whether to recoil from the intrusion or push himself further against it, mouth hanging open in a silent scream and eyes blown wide. It hurt, the burning sensation making his body tense, walls clenching around the finger inside of him.

Blake kissed him again, tongue piercing through the agent’s lips and teeth clashing together clumsily. The tongue stroked all over the inside of his mouth; against his tongue, the back of his teeth and the roof of his mouth, Jayden slowly relaxing his body. Feeling the clenching let up, Blake slipped his thumb back out, instead pushing his wet index finger inside. The smaller digit slid deeper into Jayden’s body, a breathless moan sounding between their lips. Jayden wasn’t sure who it even originated from.

His body was still burning in discomfort, but the stretch was more bearable now, Jayden holding onto the man’s shoulders for dear life as he let himself be prodded. It took a few searching thrusts, but then Blake crooked his finger just a slight bit to the right and- “AHH!”

The electric pleasure that rushed through Jayden was almost enough for him to fall from Blake’s lap, the lieutenant taking a firm hold of his hips to keep him in place as he kept assaulting that one spot inside of him. A second finger was added, both digits twisting deeper, stretching his body while making sure to stroke against the bundle of nerves.      

“Fuck, you’re so loud-!” Blake groaned into his ear, Jayden only moaning even louder than before. He wasn’t fully aware of the sounds he was making, the wet, squelching noises that came from Blake’s fingers fucking into him the only thing to truly hold his focus. The lieutenant went faster, fingers making scissor motions against Jayden’s walls and stretching him wide. Jayden mewled weakly in pleasure, placing a string of open mouthed kisses against Blake’s neck, grinding back down against the fingers with quivering tights. 

It didn’t take long before his toes curled; the knot of warmth in Jayden’s lower belly tight to the point where it would break any second. A third finger entered him then, the agent biting down into the side of his hand desperately to keep quiet. He wasn’t going to give Blake the satisfaction of hearing him scream out his name. At least not yet, anyway. “Mpfff-mhh s-stop, Blake stop!”

“Want something, Norman?” Blake asked huskily against his chin, goatee brushing against him again in that way that made Jayden shiver. “If you keep-… I’m going to cum,” he whispered back, hands creeping downwards into Blake’s pants, gently sliding against the sensitive head of his cock. “Don’t you want to be inside of me?”

Blake’s face twisted. It took him a few seconds of uncertainty before he practically lunged himself at Jayden, roughly turning his body and shoving his chest against the steering wheel. Gasping in anticipation Jayden let his gaze rest outside, his body tensing when he for a brief moment was sure that he had gained eye contact with a man who was currently crossing the street further up ahead. _Shit_! They shouldn’t be doing this here. What if someone saw? _What if someone heard?_

Scrambling to get back up, his breath hitched in his throat as he felt Blake’s member against the cleft of his ass. The man entered him swiftly, Jayden choking on a moan. It didn’t truly hurt, but the stretch of Blake’s cock was definitely more than his fingers, Jayden’s grip on the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white. He felt so full, the strain of the stretch mingling with warmth, causing him to gasp and whimper in pleasure. It was difficult for him to think straight already, pressure resting against his prostate and making him squirm.  

“The adored FBI agent getting turned on by other people watching as he’s fucked by his partner,” Blake mused behind him, arms wrapping around his legs and hoisting him further up into his lap, Blake’s still half clothed chest warm against Jayden’s naked back. The words in combination with the new position made Jayden moan loudly, the blush on his cheeks turning a deep scarlet colour. A mix of emotions ran through him, humiliation mixed with anticipation, fear mixed with pleasure, an odd sense of pride and most of all he felt secure in the other’s arms. Safe.

“What would they say, seeing ya bein’ this needy for my cock,” Blake continued, beard scratching Jayden’s shoulder and breath warm against his ear, “seeing ya being such a good fuckin’ slut for me.” Jayden could only cry out in reply, Blake’s cock assaulting his prostate with each thrust. Frantically he snapped his hips down to meet the other, the sounds of skin against skin resounding in the croaking car.

Holding the underside of the agent’s knees, Blake spread his legs even wider, now able to plunge upwards into him with ease. Jayden groaned as the other reached deeper than anyone ever had before, Blake’s name falling from his lips in a mumbled mess: “C-Cartah, ahh- yes, fuck! Fuck me, fuck me, Cartah-”

The only reply he got from the other was a particularly harsh slam against his prostate, tears of pleasure gathering at the corners of Jayden’s eyes. His abdomen shuddered painfully, the never ending battering against his nerves nearly unbearable. Blake’s movements got steadily more erratic, his fingers digging into Jayden’s skin and leaving bruises in their wake.

“You’re so fuckin’ tight,” the lieutenant growled, teeth sinking into his shoulder hard enough to draw blood, “only I get to see ya like this! You’re mine!” The tears spilled over and slid down Jayden’s cheeks, his moans broken and uneven as he nodded his head several times, “I-I’m yours, your slut. Only yours-Gaahhh C-Car-Ca-ahhh-t-t-ahh!”

Unable to take anymore Jayden came, cum splattering against his tights as he convulsed, mouth open in a silent scream. His walls clenched tightly around Blake’s cock, the older man groaning loudly as he shoved himself as deep as he could go, member pulsing as he spilled inside of the agent’s body.

They kept pushing against each other, riding out the waves of pleasure together lazily, the scent of sex heavy in the car. Panting they held each other tight, Jayden’s fingers running through Blake’s hair, while Blake stroked Jayden’s chest and stomach soothingly. Daring a glance out the windscreen Jayden thankfully found the street around them unoccupied. He checked the time before leaning fully back against Blake’s chest: 2 in the morning. It was only the two of them. Words played around on Jayden’s lips, only a few, but he bit them back. It made his stomach tighten in a nauseating way, but his decision did calm his slight anxiety. Better to leave a few things unsaid for now.

“You know,” Blake grinned after a while, licking the bite mark that he had left on the other’s shoulder, “the windows in this car are tinted.” It took a while for Jayden to understand what exactly the other meant, heat exploding in his cheeks once he caught on.  
“Th-That was…!” he sputtered, trying to wiggle free from Blake’s hold. The man simply tightened his arms around Jayden’s middle, refusing to let him budge. “Did you really think, that I would let anyone else see you like that? You’re mine, remember?”    

The words were uttered huskily into his hair, Jayden feeling like he might melt. This was definitely superior to any dream.


	4. Liquid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word 4: Liquid. 
> 
> Tags for this chapter: Homophopic language, Blake being an ass, Angst and fluff, Angst with a happy ending, Hurt/Comfort, Blake is very uncomfortable, Love confessions,  
> This takes place between Chapter 3 and Chapter 2!  
>  
> 
> I think I've used up my yearly quota of swearwords in this chapter - Good thing it's New Years soon xD I was tierd and couldn't be assed to read this through properly, so sorry for the mistakes! I'll come back and check for them later 🌻

 

**LIQUID**

The sound was driving him up the fucking wall. The continuous clicking bore deep into his skull, a soreness gathering right behind his eyes and at his temples. The precinct was hardly quiet to begin with, keys tapping and small talk echoing off the walls, the station like what he imagined the inside of a beehive. But that clicking. He had tried to force himself to ignore it, focus on his reports and reviewing the evidence he and Jayden had collected, but the sound kept striking at his nerves, settling in his body from his neck to his fingertips.

“Stop that or I’ll break the fucking thing.”

Ash looked up from his computer screen, his brow furrowed in confusion until he followed Blake’s gaze to his pen. Blake knew that it was a habit his friend usually fell into whenever he was contemplating a case, but that didn’t make the sound any less annoying.

“Gezz Carter, what’s got ya panties in a twist this mornin’?” Ash chuckled, though he wisely put the pen back down onto his desk.

Blake knew exactly what his problem was, but he could hardly tell the other male that he currently had a certain agent practically living with him for the time being. An agent, who had somehow managed to sneak from the couch and into Blake’s bed during the night. An agent, who he had woken up with in his arms.

“Not enough coffee,” he growled as he got up from his chair, rubbing a hand across his face before making his way towards the coffee machine in the corner. He didn’t need eyes in the back of his head to know that Ash was looking after him with a relaxed smirk. The prick probably picked his pen back up too.

A queue had formed in front of the machine he noted, but once the other officers saw him advancing they quickly backed off leaving the machine free. He couldn’t deny the rush of warmth that spread through him. He had no problem showing everyone that he was the alpha dog, but seeing the other’s back off submissively on their own? Oh yeah, that stroked his ego just right.

A small part of him was admittedly disappointed, however, that he didn’t have anyone to serve as a punching bag for his pent up frustration. Briefly he thought about kicking the door to Jayden’s office open. The little stunt the kid had pulled the other night still made a mess of undistinguishable feelings twist in his stomach; disgust being the only one he could truly recognize. Jayden needed to be taught a lesson. Just because they were fucking, it didn’t mean that the younger could pull shit like that.

The coffee machine beeped loudly declaring its successful brewing to the whole station. Momentarily pulled out of his thoughts he grabbed the steaming cup, swirling the light brown liquid around before taking a sip.

It was about time he sat the record straight. Sure, he liked fucking Jayden; the kid was ridiculously responsive, almost to the point of it being hilarious, and the tightness of his body felt amazing, but that was all it was. Sex had just proven to be an effective way of shutting the agent up.

He glanced at the closed door to said agent’s office once more, letting a smirk spread across his face when the door was yanked open from within, Jayden stepping out into the station. Seemed like the kid had made the choice for him.

Soft satisfaction was already spreading in his body as he with deliberately slow steps made his way towards his partner. He wondered how far he could go, how much it would take to break the kid’s collected façade and put him back in his proper place. He already felt triumphant, different scenarios with equally satiating outcomes playing out in his mind.

Having scanned the perimeter of what Blake guessed had to be his desk, Jayden’s eyes finally noticed his approaching form. The kid’s face lit up in recognition and excitement, the eager expression making Blake falter slightly in his steps.  
“Blake!” Jayden quickly closed the gap between them. “Blake, I’ve got him!”

Jayden’s eyes were an impossible teal; light blue so light that it almost slipped into pale green. When he had first met the agent those eyes had made him feel uncomfortable. He had found them eerily hollow, empty yet guarded in a way that immediately made him suspicious. The pale skin and the scar on Jayden’s cheek hadn’t helped either in convincing him that the man before him was more than a husk. Within those few initial seconds Blake had already categorized Jayden as an indifferent, metrosexual prick who was only sent by the FBI as a weak symbol of support; more a display put on for the sake of the public than anything else.

 Though he was hardly impressed with the agent at first he eventually had to, reluctantly, admit that he had judged the man wrongly. Though still clearly lacking experience when it came to real police work, the kid wasn’t half bad as a partner. Jayden had earned a bit of Blake’s good will when he proved himself ready to pull the trigger. Of course, Nathaniel turned out to just be a god fearing idiot, but even so: If Nathaniel _had_ had a knife Blake would owe it to Jayden that he wasn’t hurt.

Now, he found himself starring into those hollow eyes, surprised to find them bottomless and enthralling instead. The light blue was gently stirred by the fluorescent lights above them rolling wave-like against the slight shades of grey and green. They looked so incredibly… _Alive._

“About fucking time!” he huffed with a slight smirk, following the agent back towards his office. Jayden reminded him of a child in his eager triumph, the younger man practically skipping instead of walking. Not that he could truly claim to be much different, adrenaline and excitement already making his skin tingle, his muscles clenching in anticipation.

They had been after this particular bastard for about a month or so now. Mathieu Richard, or just ’Ricky’ as they had manage to coax from one of the people they had interrogated. He was the leader of a drug ring, a murderer, a pimp- the list went on and on.  He had been absurdly difficult to find, since every crime scene had been wiped completely clean of all evidence, a single 9mm cartridge left standing upright in the middle of the scene like a taunt.

It had given them jack shit to go on; the 9mm was pretty much standard for at least several NATO countries, not to mention that is was the most common type used by police forces around the world. It had agitated Blake to the point where he didn’t sleep much at night, rage and hatred twisting in his gut. The insult was an open challenge, one that he sure as hell wasn’t going to lose.

In the end it had been a piece of skin underneath the most recent victim’s fingernails that had led them to a breakthrough. Blake and Jayden had arrested and interrogated thugs off the street for a week until they finally had enough information for Jayden to piece together a profile and from there calculate possible strongholds.  

Blake wasn’t quite sure how to react though, when Jayden now pulled him into his office and pointed at his computer screen, the various lines and dot coming together right next to one of the main roads, a large building circled on the map. ‘Ricky’ was holed up in a nightclub. A gay nightclub.

*

It took about 12 hours to get an operation together, Perry granting them access to whatever they might need. The plan was simple; two officers would go undercover in the night club and pretend to be lovers on a date while simultaneous keeping an eye out for their target and make sure that he did not manage to leave before they had him in cuffs. Ramírez and Jensen were chosen to go in, both officers looking slightly awkward at the prospect but agreeing either way. The plan was set.

The easy confidence that had settled in Blake’s shoulders didn’t last, however. Being called into Perry’s office was a pretty normal occurrence. Most of the time it was due to Blake and Jayden causing yet another ruckus with their constant arguing, but other times, which seemed to be the case now, it was something in relation to a case they were working on.

It was always either-or; the meeting between them and the captain either one full of empty threats or one where the balding man praised them to the point where he might as well have licked their shoes.

Blake hated the last one especially. He could deal with rage and disappointment, knowing full well that Perry was just full of shit as usual. After all he couldn’t really fire the two detectives who had solved the case of the Origami Killer, not without suffering quite a big deal of negative media attention. Well, technically only one of them had solved the case, but there was no need to correct the captain.

What Blake couldn’t stand, was the way that Perry treated them like their shit didn’t stink. Sure, it did have several benefits to be in the other’s good graces, but he had already attained those before Jayden had even arrived at the precinct. Perhaps this was one of the reasons why Blake was getting tired of the whole charade at an alarming rate.  When Perry licked your ass, it was only to ask you to do something ludicrous next time he drew in a breath.

As much as he had, admittedly, used this very trait to his advantage and had effectively taken over the real leadership of the station right below Perry’s nose, he now truly did wish that their captain was less of a spineless famewhore.

“Let’s just cut to the chase, Leighton,” he sighed out, doing his best to keep his voice levelled and friendly despite his patience already wearing at an alarming rate; “what do you need from us?” He just wanted to get out there and get the whole thing going, predatory expectation tingling in his fingers.

Perry’s smiling face fell away instantly, the wrinkles of frustration appearing on his face as the captain relaxed back in his chair. He sighed loudly, running a hand through the sparse hair on top of his head, “the two of you need to go undercover in the club tonight.”  
Jayden tilted his head quizzically: “I thought we already had someone on this? What happened to Ramírez and Jensen?” The quick glance he exchanged with Blake was pensive at best. It made Blake’s fingers twitch against the armrest of his chair, fighting back an instinctive urge to put himself between Jayden and Perry. His mind was still slowly catching up on the whole thing, his first concern being who he could trust to have command if he wasn’t there to make sure everyone was in position. Ash was the obvious answer, and if he was going to put his life in the hands of anyone, he would prefer it to be him.

“Ramírez was in an accident last night on his way home, he’s currently at the hospital, and well, fuck knows what the hell is up with Jensen,” the captain moaned, fatigue bursting to the surface on his underwhelmed face. “I know that you are both aware that we need this case solved yesterday, and I’m not about to let your hard work go to waste. We will get him, but we cannot delay.”  

 _‘Your hard work’_ Blake huffed, knowing full well that his unimpressed demeanour shone through. When exactly had Perry taken control of this? A warm feeling of triumph settled in his chest when Perry shifted in his chair.

A beat of silence settled in the office before Blake exploded. “FUCK NO! No way in hell am I- I with- no! Absolutely not!”  
“The two of you are the most familiar with the case, plus if things go south you are the best officers we’ve got,” Perry said slowly, clearly confident in the logic behind his decision. He had probably practiced that sentence. Asshole.  
“He does have a point,” Jayden mumbled dryly, avoiding looking at Blake when he turned his attention on him.

Oh, so this was how it was going to be? Fucking kid was probably thrilled with having an excuse to be all lovely dovely. It made Blake feel nauseous. Maybe this was some kind of revenge? A way to get back on all the times where Blake had humiliated him and, now for the last two months or so, the times he had dominated the younger’s body.

Again he thought of the morning where Jayden had managed to snuggle, _fucking snuggle_ , with him sometime during the night. He wasn’t sure what currently pissed him off the most; the thought of having to actually enter and walk around the gay club or that Jayden had somehow gotten them into a situation where Blake would have to act in accordance to the other’s wishes. A stay thought in the back of his head pointed out, that this whole thing could hardly be something that Jayden had planned, but he strangled it before it could get a foothold.

Fine. He had planned to give the agent a reminder of exactly where they stood anyway, so if Jayden wanted it to go down at this club? Fine with him! “Fuck okay! Let’s just get moving!”

*

Even standing outside on the street the bass from the music inside the club struck against the passer-byer’s bones. Neon signs were flashing in a mixture of pink and blue, bathing the entire street in a purple sea of colour.

As if to really get the point across the façade of the building was painted in rainbow colours, the paint sliding down the concrete wall in a way that supposedly resembled a waterfall. On top of the coloured water a series of gender symbols were painted in black, the Mars and Venus signs the only ones that Blake was able to recognize. He felt slightly dizzy looking at how the various symbols intertwined with each other on the wall.

What made Blake wince in repulsion, however, was the name. The largest of the neon signs, situated right above the front entrance, displayed two cocks rubbing their beaks together. Then the colour on the sign shifted and formed the words ‘The Cockpit’ instead. Not like the whole thing was obnoxiously obvious already!  
“That’s about as subtle as a kick in the head,” Blake mumbled dryly, rubbing a hand across his face to gather his nerves. This fucking shit was such a fucking bad fucking idea.     
“Even for a night club that name is… In questionable taste,” Jayden agreed with a pale face.

In order to blend in better they had both been instructed to leave their work attire at home. Blake felt slightly uncomfortable at the prospect, but at least he had managed to cheat by simply throwing on a thin sweater, that his sister had gifted him about a hundred years ago, over his usual dark blue shirt. It was a slight bit tight over his chest but otherwise it fit perfectly, and if nothing else it kept him warm.

The real issue was wearing a pair of jeans and not having his tie around his neck. He couldn’t shake the feeling of nakedness despite being well aware that he wasn’t. His sister would sometimes joke that with him being practically one with his job it was like talking to his ‘uniform’, as she called it, rather than talking to her big brother. He supposed that was true in a way, though he had never pondered much on it before.

It had been surprisingly difficult to leave his gun and badge behind, and now the lack of his usual attire somehow made that feeling of nothingness grow inside of his chest. It really was like everything that he was, everything he had fought to become, was somehow sewn into the fabric. Without all of these things he was- he was nothing. He was just Carter, ten years old and hiding away underneath his bed so that nobody would hear or see him cry.    

“Are you okay?” he heard Jayden whisper next to him, the gentle touch on his arm making him jump slightly. The agent was shaking like a leaf, the idiot only dressed in a pair of ripped, skinny jeans and a washed out band t-shirt. His hair was a mess too. Apparently that was what generally went as ‘sexy’ now. Not that he found it all that striking. The t-shirt was even too big for the kid, constantly looking as if it was about to slide down his shoulder and- fuck.  
“I’m fine, stop fucking babying me,” he hissed and jerked his arm free, stuffing both hands into his pockets as he stalked towards the loud building.

“Bla-Carter,” Jayden caught up with him a bit too quickly, “Carter, take my hand.”  
“What?! Fuck off yo-“  
“We have to make this look convincing,” the younger man whispered through his teeth, his gaze unweaning and insistent.  
“He’s right,” Ash’s voice sounded from the hidden device in Blake’s left ear, “time to show off those romancing skills.”  
Blake’s stomach churned painfully, his chest feeling tight and his throat clogging up. “Fine,” he hissed, grabbing Jayden’s hand with a striking-like movement. He was well aware that his grip was too tight, but that only made him want to squeeze the smaller hand even more. Jayden sent him a heated glare.

The muscular idiot at the door gave them a lazy look over, Jayden leaning further into Blake’s body with a theatrical chuckle. He had to suppress the instinct to flinch. F fucking minus for the kid in freaking acting: Why, this was going to be great! With an inward groan Blake reluctantly took charge of the situation, dropping Jayden’s hand and instead placing his palm against the agent’s lower back. Luckily the few couples in front of them shielded their awkward start just enough that the doorman simply let them pass without incident.

“Remind me to never ever do something like this with you ever again, Norman,” he mumbled dryly as they entered the big hall, coloured lights bathing the writhing bodies on the dance floor. The music was so loud that Blake couldn’t even hear himself, not surprised when Jayden didn’t answer.

They found a vantage point slightly off to the side, both men sighing in relieve when the music at this position proved a little less eardrum-shattering. From here they had a clear view of the office above the DJ stand, as well as the staircase and the adjacent dancefloor.

Blake supposed he should be feeling better now that the operation had begun, but instead he felt the adrenaline mixing with that clenching feeling from before, his eyes constantly drifting to Jayden.

As if the younger had somehow read his thoughts, he leaned close to Blake’s side, causing the older male to shift awkwardly. It didn’t seem to alert the younger though, as he simply snuggled closer.  
“In position,” Jayden whispered into the microphone hidden away underneath Blake’s collar. He could feel how the warmth breath slid against his skin, causing goose bumps to spread across his neck.  
“Roger that. Everyone on stand-by, ready to go on your signal.” Ash chirped in their ears. His friend sounded way too happy delivering that standard message.

Blake’s fingers twitched in anticipation again. He was definitely going to kick Ash’s fucking ass once this thing was over. The decision to only conceal a microphone on Blake was probably to make this as uncomfortable for him as possible. He could picture Ash laughing now that the transmission had ended.  

He nearly choked on a breath when Jayden’s hand found his again. Shit. Panic began creeping up along his spine, making his body tense up. Where the hell was he supposed to go with this now? He felt like an idiot for not thinking of this sooner, but somehow the reality of having to act like lovers hit him like a goddamn steamroller. Public displays of affection always made him cringe. _Sure, go nuts and screw each other like rabbits when you’re home, but keep that shit out of my fucking face!_ Now he almost wished that he had actually payed attention.

As if caught in the headlight of a train they both stood there awkwardly, hands holding each other loosely. Fuck they were so goddamn obvious. Closing his eyes to rub a hand across his face in frustration, he instead found his mind zooming in on the feeling of Jayden’s hand. It was cold, just like it had been the first time he had held it. Cold sweat had quickly gathered between their palms making the touch wet and uncomfortable. Of course the idiot was cold when he was only wearing a t-shirt in goddamn November!

Refusing to think too much, Blake quickly grabbed the agent and forced him to spin around, gathering him in his arms and clutching him against his chest. He could feel the cold from Jayden’s body seep through even his sweater. “Wear a goddamn cardigan or something next time,” he huffed not truly caring if Jayden heard him or not. It was like pressing an ice cube against naked skin, but instead of letting go like his instincts told him to, Blake tugged the other man closer yet.

With the both of them standing upright like this, it was impossible for him to ignore the few inches that the other had on him. Why did the stupid kid have to be so tall? Due to the difference in height their close embrace became slightly uncomfortable, both men shifting around until Jayden was leaning back slightly against the wall, their bodies now fitting together.

“Can ya see?” he whispered into the agent’s hair, feeling the shiver than ran through the other male’s body. “Yeah,” Jayden breathed, resting his chin against Blake’s shoulder to ease his ability to glance around. For a while they simply just stood like that, the smell of Jayden’s shampoo and cologne assaulting Blake’s nose. When had the smell of him started to become so familiar? Sure it had been two months, but- The thought made something twist in his stomach, another knot being added to the string of feelings that made his fight or flight instinct threaten to kick in. He had to break the kid soon.

He held onto Jayden until his body finally began to not feel like an oversized ice cream. Having his back to the crowded club, and the practically living dancefloor, made him feel less overwhelmed, his nerves settling slightly as he forced his body to relax. “Don’t get any ideas,” he said coldly, “this whole thing changes nothing. We’re not a couple. I don’t love you.” A beat of silence spread between them, and for a time he wondered if the agent had even heard him. He could feel the younger’s heart beating against the side of his chest.

Just when he was about to repeat himself, however, the other answered: “I know.” It was a soft sound, carefully kept neutral. It pissed him off.  
“Good. Always remember that I’m just playing with you,” he continued, determined to get some kind of reaction from the other man, “I’ll throw you away once I’m bored. You are nothing but my toy.”      
“I know,” the other repeated, voice wavering slightly now. Perfect.

Satisfied he loosened his grip on Jayden, waiting for the warm wave of pleasure. It didn’t come. Instead he felt cold; the coolness coming from the inside of his bones and radiating outwards. Confused he pulled away from the other man completely, gazing towards the entrance. The desire to go back home had grown too, but despite this he felt like he was nailed in place. He had gotten what he wanted: Jayden finally understood that he was nothing and there would be no more disgusting attempts at cuddling. Yet it didn’t feel like the triumph it should have been.

It just hadn’t settled properly in his body yet! With a huff he turned his attention back to Jayden, the defiant smirk on his face faltering immediately. Jayden’s face was completely blank as hollow eyes kept looking forwards and waited for their target to show. It reminded Blake of a doll. His chest tightened again, causing a sharp stab through his abdomen. He didn’t like that look on Jayden’s face.

  
“Shit! There he is,” Jayden cursed, his poker face only lifting slightly as he turning his head towards Blake, ready to alert the other officers. He didn’t give the younger male the chance, though, as he roughly grabbed the sides of Jayden’s face and pushed their lips together.

He felt more than heard the high sound of alarm that came from Jayden, the agent’s arms immediately pushing against his chest. He didn’t let up. Instinct was driving him forwards as he thrusted his tongue into Jayden’s mouth, the taste of the other man making his head spin. The wet sounds of their saliva mixing resounded in his ear.

 A sharp pain made him pull away with a jerk, the taste of copper spreading in his mouth. Jayden had bit his tongue. The agent remained leaning against the wall, panting as he wiped saliva from his lips with blazing eyes. Shit, he looked so hot. Jayden’s t-shirt had actually fallen from his shoulder in his struggle to get free, the sight of his shoulder making something primal twist in Blake. Absentmindedly he took a hold of the collar of his shirt, lifting the microphone up to his mouth and signalling Ash.

He didn’t really register the chaos that ensued as their colleagues rushed the club, choosing to ignore the whole ordeal in favour of starring at Jayden. He wanted to kiss him again. The agent’s face had twisted into confusion, though the fire in his eyes quickly reignited, jaw squared and hands balled into fists. “Fuck. Off. Blake,” he growled, anger making his pale skin flare. Contradictory to his words Jayden pushed past Blake, shoulder hard against his chest. It didn’t hurt, but the hatred behind it was clear.

Hearing commotion behind him, Blake turned around and watched as ‘Ricky’ was forced to the dancefloor and promptly handcuffed. He would have been disgusted with his lack of concentration on the job if he hadn’t felt so dazed, eyes having a hard time to stay off Jayden who stalked towards the exit.  
“You know, mate,” Ash’s voice cut through him, British accent mixed with American clear as a bell from the device in his ear, “for those of us who’ve known ya for a while… You’re a really bad liar.”

He didn’t even feel angry that Ash had heard everything through the microphone and easily put two and two together. A few hours ago the idea of anyone knowing that he was fucking Jayden had seemed like one of the worst things in the world, but now it was completely inconsequential. Though reluctant he found that he simply couldn’t hold back the realization anymore. He was in love with Jayden. Shit.

*

The drive back to Blake’s house was raw. None of them said anything until Blake pulled up into his driveway. Car in neutral, handbrake, kill the engine. The added silence from the car only made the stillness between them heavier, Blake swallowing dryly. He had never been any good with this stuff and- he groaned loudly at himself, turning his head out the window next to him. At least he didn’t have to look at Jayden as he embarrassed himself.  Shit, how did he begin? The sound of the car door opening had his entire body going into overdrive, words spilling from his lips on their own accord: “Shit you’re not my toy! I won’t throw you a-awayI’mjustsconfusedbecauseIlikeyoumorethanIknowhowto!”

Fuck he wanted to run himself over repeatedly. _Real smooth I can already hear him laughing,_ he taunted himself, the car feeling progressively smaller around him. The sound of the car door being closed made him jolt. _Sure fucked that up pretty spectacularly._ “Such an idiot,” he mumbled against the steering wheel, unwelcome flashes of Jayden’s naked body against that very steering wheel making him groan. Slowly he dragged his body from the quickly cooling car, following Jayden up to his front door.

 It had been his almost-wife that had fallen in love with this house when they first saw it. He had just become a cop and she was working as a kindergarten teacher, so it had been ridiculously out of their price range, but after hearing her bicker about it for half a year, his would be father-in-law had bought the house for them. The first few years the house had looked like a real home, but as their relationship began to falter, so did the house. Thank god he never actually married her.

He had blamed himself at first; his constant absence seeming like the obvious reason. Though as the years passed, he wasn’t so sure anymore.  The clarity that comes with hindsight showed a couple who had simply just gotten worn-out by each other. They had been on and off during most of high school, not because they were really that great together, and probably not because they actually liked each other either, as sad as it sounded. They had somehow just always gone back to each other because it was an option that was always available. It was easy.

In the end she had vanished with one of her colleagues and he hadn’t heard from her since. For some reason he had been allowed to keep the house without any sort of payment or fuzz. One day an envelope had simply arrived with papers stating that the house was now his completely. Maybe his would be in-laws felt bad for their daughter breaking the engagement in such a way, but he really didn’t care. Far as he was concerned he was gifted a house and escaped from a loveless marriage.

It took him an embarrassing amount of tries to get the door open. He cursed under his breath as he missed the lock completely, finally managing to shove it into the lock on his fifth attempt. Once the lock finally clicked, he was shoved forwards, the door falling open as both men ended up in a heap on the floor, their feet still outside on the porch.

The hard, wooden floor was uncomfortable, but in that very moment he couldn’t find it in himself to care. The feeling of Jayden’s lips pressed longingly against his own was the only thing that mattered.


	5. Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word 5: Touch
> 
> Tags for this chapter: Fluff, Sappy fluff, just all the FLUFF, idiots being in love, hinted love making 
> 
> Really, this is just a small chapter for those of you who, like me, are suckers for a bit of sappy romance (ﾉ∀`♥)  
> This takes place immediately after chapter 4!
> 
> (Chapter 6 will be up soon <3 )

 

**TOUCH**

 

Jayden kissed him over and over. His needy behaviour would have been amusing if Blake wasn’t so far gone himself, the lack of air and the taste of Jayden in his mouth making it difficult to focus on anything for more than a brief second at a time. A low groan left his lips when he finally managed to rid himself of his jacket, leaving it tangled up on floor next to the coat hanger. The sound was repeated back to him and Jayden broke the kiss; both gulping down a large mouthful of air before they reconnected.

Outside the cold November wind picked up, icy gusts of wind entering the house and sweeping across their tangled up bodies, making them both shiver. It was enough to clear Blake’s mind slightly, making him pull away from their passionate embrace. He never moved far, though, as his eyes were easily captured by the look on Jayden’s face.

Pale cheeks had turned rosy, pupils blown wide in light blue eyes and lower lip quivering slightly. His t-shirt had slid from his shoulder again. Blake might not be good with words, but he spoke the language of action perfectly, idly kicking his front door closed with a slam, leaning forwards against the floor again and taking Jayden into his arms.

The coarse hairs of the doormat was digging into the sides of their hips, the wooden floor cold and the house cast in complete darkness. Embracing Jayden, however, made him feel warm. He tugged the younger against his chest and buried his face into the brown, messy locks. Beneath the slightly unpleasant smell of wax or whatever shit Jayden put in his hair, he could make out the scent of soap and camomile.  
“You smell like a mother,” he teased, though for once there was no trace of jeering in his voice.  
“And you love it,” came the tender reply from below, making him feel slightly breathless.  
 Though he knew that Jayden couldn’t see his face, he buried his face deeper into his hair out of instinct. “Yeah,” he admitted voice barely above a whisper, “I do.”

He had no idea for how long they remained like this on the floor, laying on their sides and facing each other, limbs tangled in a warm embrace. Though the idea of being in love with Jayden was slowly starting to sink in, he still felt overwhelmed. His chest ached in a way that was nearly painful, an odd desire to protect and pull the other man close until the younger was absorbed into his very being made him coil slightly in insecurity. He refused to label it as the feeling of love, instead categorizing it as simple possessiveness.

For what had to be the hundredth time in much too short span of weeks, he questioned just how he had become like this. Naturally he blamed Jayden, though he couldn’t even pretend to be upset about it. Not anymore. The agent was slowly sliding his hand up beneath his sweater and shirt, making Blake sigh deeply into his hair. Vaguely he noted that this was the first time Jayden initiated anything intimate.

Up until that point it had been pent up frustration and lust that had guided them together, Blake always being the first to reach out and claim the kid. He hadn’t been joking the times he confessed to liking Jayden’s body. Sure, the other always responded eagerly to his advances; if not right away then after a few moments of persuasion, but this time Jayden was touching _him_ first.  Admittedly the touch was slow and a bit hesitant, but the smooth, tickling sensation of his fingertips was gentle none the less. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been touched like this. The innocent affection in the action caused his chest to clench even worse than it had while they were still at the club.

Leaning back slightly, he let his lips slide against the skin on Jayden’s forehead, his voice already sounding light and out of breath as he whispered: “Hey. Let’s go to bed.” He felt more than heard Jayden gasp, the wandering hands on his abdomen stopping shortly in their caress. The younger man’s answer came in the form of a chaste kiss, lips soft and warm against his own. It was immediately followed by another. And another. And another again. The gentle pressure of lips, Jayden’s hands on his skin. Fuck, he didn’t want to do anything but this for the rest of his life.

It took a great deal of willpower to not chase after Jayden’s lips when the kid broke away. The younger man kept starring at his lips with a dazed expression, his hand slowly reaching up and trailing over his own moist lips before biting gently at his thumb. _Jesus fucking Christ on a Mercedes fucking Benz_! Did Jayden even know how ridiculously fuckable he looked like that? A lump was quickly forming in Blake’s throat, the fire in his gut reigniting with a roar. Fuck, this was gonna end badly if he didn’t get the kid into his bed soon.

As if he felt the shift in mood within the Lieutenant, Jayden finally seemed to snap out of his daze, looking up through his eyelashes and meeting Blake’s gaze. Immediately a brighter shade of red shot up in the agent’s cheeks, visible even in the dark. He didn’t like to acknowledge it, not even after everything that had transpired between them, but the only word that seemed fitting for Jayden in that was moment was ‘cute’. Quickly the younger male averted his gaze, both hands clutching the front of Blake’s shirt shyly. No, not cute; ‘gorgeously adorable’. Yeah, that was it. Fuck, he wanted to swoop down and kiss him again.  

Before he had the chance, however, Jayden shot up from his position on the floor, leaning over Blake and clashing their lips together. The kiss was clumsy, more teeth than anything else, their tongues fighting against each other like two bulls. Jayden moaned softly against the organ currently being pushed back into his mouth, shuddering as he hoisted a leg over Blake’s hips and settled down into his lap.

That was all it took for the last few strings to snap. He wasn’t sure what exactly came first, the rough growl from his chest, his hands grabbing the back of Jayden’s tights, or the feeling of his tongue being sucked playfully. Not that he actually gave a damn. Regardless, he found himself on his feet with a chuckling agent in his arms, lips still connected by playful biting and pulling.

The kid honestly needed to eat more he thought, as he made his way to his bedroom in quick strides. Jayden was already pulling at his clothes, trying to get the sweater over Blake’s head without breaking their kisses. A smirk tugged at his own lips as the younger chuckled again, the contagious sound making Blake’s chest flutter. He would force him to eat something- later.      

Their clothes created a trail in perfect Hansel and Gretel style behind them, as Jayden was finally pushed down onto the bed. The whimper of anticipation that left the younger made Blake’s mouth water. He kissed along Jayden’s neck, sucking bruises into the skin as he went lower. He was drawn to a cluster of birthmarks right below Jayden’s collarbone. Despite having seen the other naked before, this was the first time he had noticed them. His heart was beating so hard he briefly wondered if he was having a heart attack. The thought that this was the first time he was seeing, actually _seeing_ Jayden made him feel dizzy.

He drew a line between the dark spots with a finger, connecting them in an almost straight line. The three birthmarks were hardly symmetrical, but he guessed that the same was probably true for stars, idly drawing the straight line between them that formed Orion’s belt.

 The soft caress made the atmosphere around them shift once again, naked bodies sliding against each other slowly as they melted together. Warm hands caressed every inch of skin within reach, fingers tangling in hair, lips kissing and licking. Blake had never been good with words; but actions? Oh yeah, those he knew how to do. 


	6. Sickness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Sickness  
> Tags for this chapter: Referenced drug abuse, withdrawals, sickness, hurt/comfort, fluff, very (!) bad puns,
> 
>  
> 
> I apologize for missing my deadline slightly this time around! For some unknown reason this particular chapter was giving me a lot more trouble than any of the others did... Anyway, I hope you enjoy regardless! <3

 

**SICKNESS**

 

“Again?” He heard the captain sigh on the other end of the line. He didn’t have to be in the office to know that Perry was currently wearing a disapproving scowl, the frustrated tension in his voice making it clear enough. “I realize that you are still getting used to the weather, but this is the third time thi-“  
“I know Sir, I’m sorry.”  
“Well it can’t be helped; if you are sick then you are sick. But please, stay home until you are actually better this time!”  
“Yes, Sir. Understood.”  
  
Exhausted he let himself fall backwards onto the bed, forcing himself to breath in and out slowly as the ceiling kept flickering from the white plaster to an ocean blue sky. Groaning he closed his eyes, battling the oncoming slaughter of nausea. For a long time his withdrawals had been relatively mild; the occasional headache or nosebleed causing him discomfort but not to the point where he couldn’t work through it. Lately, though, his symptoms had been getting stronger, more severe.  
  
He had woken up with a start in the middle of the night, throwing himself from the bed and into the bathroom. He hadn’t had enough time to reach the toilet, instead forced to bend over the end of the bathtub, throwing up and wheezing in pain.

“Are you okay sir?” A familiar voice asked, cold shivers of fear running down along Jayden’s spine. Resting his head against the cold side of the tub he slowly forced himself to look up. He would recognize that red jacket with the two rows of golden buttons anywhere. Fuck, this was bad. He hadn’t seen the butler since he saved Shaun Mars and quit the ARI program all together, but the sight of the gentle, fatherly face almost made him feel like weeping.

“H-How-“ he croaked, more bile rising from his throat and cutting him off before he could finish. He gave himself a few moments to breath afterwards, before he tried again: “H-How are you here? You shouldn’t be here…”  
“What do you mean, Sir?” the butler asked him gently, head tilted a bit to the side as he crouched down and placed a delicate looking cocktail glass onto the floor, “here’s your vodka.”  
“N-No, I- I don’t want-You need to leave!”  
“Like fucking hell I do! This is my fucking house!”

Seeing Carter Blake manifest himself in the butler’s place, the cocktail glass in reality a regular glass of water, would have made him groan in annoyance a few months prior. Now, the realization simply made him scurry off the floor, legs wobbly as he embraced the other man. Blake cursed and tried to shove him away, complaining that Jayden stunk of vomit. Everything became a little hazy after that, but Jayden soon found himself being gently guided back down onto the bed, feeling Blake’s arms cradle him.

He could hear said man rummage through the kitchen now, a smell of coffee hitting his nostrils. Despite his love for the brew, it made his already turning stomach do a summersault, bile momentarily forcing its way up his throat before he managed to will it back down. Swallowing dryly he groaned and grimaced at the sour taste in his mouth. He hated just lying in bed, but Blake had ordered him to stay put. They both knew that Jayden’s nausea would only get worse if he tried to walk around, but that hadn’t stopped the two of them from arguing about it.

The bed dipped next to him, and Jayden didn’t bother to hide the small smile that spread on his face. “Stop fucking grinning,” Blake huffed, annoyance and impatient mixing together as what Jayden had come to known as simply ‘Blake’s before-he-drinks-his-coffee-grumpy voice’, “it makes you look stupid.” Hearing the other man slurp, Jayden slowly opened his eyes to find the other sitting at the edge of the bed, coffee cup in hand. Another cup had been put on the bedside table next to a tall glass of water and two bottles of pills. Then, in a softer voice; “You okay?”

Already feeling dizzy from the movement Jayden sat up in bed, resting his back against the headboard and rubbing his pounding temple. The world around him kept shifting, locations only manifesting themselves halfway before they changed again, skipping and lagging like an old computer. Eventually his vision seemed to settle on the surface of Mars, although various species of fish were swimming idly around them.  
 “Well, we’re currently sort of standing at the bottom of the ocean, so I would say I’m about as happy as a clam.”  
Blake’s tone of voice immediately shifted: “Stop it.”  
“Why? I’m having a whale of a time.”  
“Norman I will fucking hurt you.”  
“Oh, don’t be so crabby, Cartah! The world is your oyster.”    
The groan that followed sounded like it was caused by actual, physical pain.

“If you are well enough to make goddamn puns then I’m off. Don’t fucking hurt yourself while I’m gone got it?” Emptying his coffee cup Blake rose from the bed again, stalking back out of the room in long strides.  
“Have a lovely day, darling!” he called after the lieutenant in a sing-song voice, doing his best to replicate the classic Hollywood housewife role from the old black and white movies. The disgusted gaging sound that came from Blake before the front door was swiftly shut, made Jayden laugh out loud.      

He had been taken aback when he had found Blake’s collection of movies. He had predicted that the older man would have a few westerns or something like it; movies about macho men saving the day and eating lots of meat of some shit that was equally cliché and sexist. Instead what he found was predominantly old, black and white classics. It’s a Wonderful Life, Citizen Kane, Casablanca, the list went on. He even found Modern Times and The Gold Rush by Charlie Chaplin.

This was yet another aspect of the lieutenant that did not match the profile he had built of the older man. He had lost count on how many times he had had to mentally rewrite the whole thing by now. When he had asked Blake about it, he had mostly brushed it off mumbling something about his sister being into them and talking about them all the time. Apparently the collection was old Christmas gifts from her as she adamantly tried to share her enjoyment with Blake. As much as he had tried to sound nonchalant about it, Jayden had caught him watching them a few times over the past few months, though, mostly at night when the other man was restless and thought that Jayden was asleep.

He had never considered that Blake might have siblings, though now that he knew he blamed himself for having overlooked something so obvious. It truthfully explained a great deal; his need for being the ‘leader of the pack’ as first born children often having tendencies towards being controlling. It fit with how hard working he was, achievement-orientation and a respect of authority being other common traits. It solved a part of the puzzle that was Carter Blake somewhat, but he still found the older man to be confusing and unpredictable half the time.   

Laying back down he weakly pushed the covers off his body, cold sweat forming on his back and forehead. Reluctantly he eyed the bottles of pills on the nightstand. __  
“Really, Norman?” he heard his own voice call out to him, seeing himself leaning against the wall in front of him, “you filled our body with tripto until our brain literally started frying, but you hesitate now when it comes to pain medication?”  
“Shut up,” he mumbled, eyes still on the bottles, “you’re not real.”  
“Maybe not, but what is the difference really? You sure seem to be in a bit of a mix right now,” the other him shrugged, taking a few steps forwards to allow a stingray to pass by undisturbed.

Ignoring the phantom he reached for the pills, reading the tags on the bottles. One was to alleviate his nausea and the other was regular pain medication to help his fever and headache. He took the suggested dose of both, hesitating for a few seconds before he took yet another pill for his headache, downing the water is hungry gulps. Jayden decided that even though Blake was gruff and hardly an affectionate caretaker he was still absolutely perfect at it.    
“You are pathetic,” his double ganger tsked, sharing his thoughts.  
“Probably,” he answered with a small smile, sighing as he closed his eyes and relaxed as best he could. He missed Blake. His cheeks flushed with warmth as the realisation sunk in.

His withdrawals were always easier to get through when Blake was by his side. When his nausea was really bad, the smell of Blake’s skin and his cologne was often the only scent that Jayden could stand, and when his hallucinations went wild, his lover was always able to ground him again, slowly coaxing him into focusing entirely on Blake’s face and the feeling of his hands rubbing his back. The pills were slowly beginning to work, his frazzled mind finally able to locate the breaks. Relief washed over him, body heavy and mind finally, blissfully empty. He kept thinking of Blake as the vast expense of orange hued sky faded into a white, firm celling.

He couldn’t remember falling asleep, nor waking up again for that matter. His entire body was shivering, cramps rushing through his legs and abdomen. Writhing in pain he tried to brace himself for what was to come. He had gone through this more than enough times to recognize the beginning of a really bad time. He stretched his body as best he could, his legs shaking and unsteady as he climbed out of bed. Despite his best effort to keep his movements steady, his head exploded with white pain as he stood, making him throw up hopelessly onto the bedroom floor. Shit, he needed to clean- Another convulsion of his stomach caused him to bend in half again, tears gathering at the corner of his eyes.

His vision was black around the edges as he crawled into the bathroom, heaving for air and coughing. There was nothing in his stomach he realized weakly, having slept until this point and therefor forgotten to eat. Shit that had to be why this hurt so fucking much. With a groan he collapsed on the floor next to the toilet, trying to focus on breathing evenly. 

At least his stomach seemed somewhat satisfied for now. Figures it would be over once he made it to the bathroom. Reaching up he wiped the tears from his eyes, his chest tightening as the liquid on his fingers revealed itself to be crimson. He forced himself up off the floor, supporting his weight against the sink as he turned on the water, washing the bitterness from his mouth before cleaning his face. It honestly didn’t do much in making him look any better, his face still pale and eyes glassed over, obviously sick.

 “Jesus fucking Christ Norman,” The growl made him jolt slightly turning to see Blake standing in the door to the bathroom with a deep scowl. Blood was still in small drops everywhere on the floor, a sickly trail of greenish-brown alkaline fluid leading to the bedroom. Unable to truly find anything to say he choked on a croak, maintaining his firm grip on the sink to prevent his hands from shaking.

*

He felt awful about Blake having to clean up his vomit. Shame and humiliation twisted in his stomach to the point where he felt like throwing up again. Had he been in any condition to argue he would have done anything to deal with it himself, but Blake had easily ignored his protests and carried him out onto the couch without a single word of acknowledgement. To make matters even worse, the lieutenant had then gone to the kitchen and come back with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich of all things.

 The whole ordeal made Jayden feel like a child, not sure if he should find the whole thing condescending and demeaning, or take a small happiness in Blake caring for him like this. As he devoured the snack with embarrassing eagerness he had just about made his mind up in favour of the latter option, when Blake returned. With a sigh the man sat down next to him, silence settling between them as Jayden finished eating. His mind shifted through various things to say, but before he could come up with anything to break the silence, Blake spoke up: “You feelin’ okay?”  
“Yeah,” he answered after a while, shrugging awkwardly as he shifted around a bit, “better.”  
“Good. I don’t want you to puke on me.”  
Before he could react Blake had grabbed a hold of his waist, guiding Jayden up towards him and down onto the couch. They usually curled up together like this right before they went to sleep, but until this point it had mostly been Jayden that initiated the contact, scooting into Blake’s personal space until the older male gave up in trying to push him away. 

Blake’s chest felt warm against his back, his own breathing falling into sync with the rise and fall easily.  
“Cart-“  
“Shut it. I told Perry I was going home early today, so relax and get some sleep.”  
“What? You-“  
“Do I need to fucking gag you to shut you up?”  
He could feel the gust of breath from Blake’s amused huff against his neck. A whirling sensation settled in his chest, the feeling light and heavy at the same time. Despite being taller than Blake he always felt small in the other’s arms. He supposed that shouldn’t be nearly as comforting as it was.  
“Maybe later,” he hummed back, giving into the warm sense of security.  
“That can be arranged,” he heard Blake mumble lightly, the feeling of lips pressed against his neck the last thing he registered before falling asleep again.


	7. Clash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Clash  
> Tags for this chapter: Angst, case fic (kinda), mentions of child murder, interrogation, very brief mention of pedophilia, police brutality, none too graphic violence, arguments, hate sex (though only in the beginning), making love, fluff in the end 
> 
> I decided to challenge myself with this chapter and write Jayden and Blake arguing. This is probably the most in character they have been so far, but boy was it difficult to write! I keep wanting to turn everything into fluff instantly xD Oh welp, hope you all enjoy! 
> 
> ( I'm too tierd to read this through properly - Yes again, I'm a lazy bastard <3 - so I apologize for any mistakes! Will look through it later and fix what I find 🌻 )

 

**CLASH**

 

”Look, I’m telling you! The guy was a complete stranger I had never seen him before in my life. All of a sudden he was just there, handing me this bag.”  
“And you just spontaneously decided to burn it?”  
“I-I thought it was garbage or something. I was already burning the leaves so why else would he have handed me anything?”  
“And you didn’t look inside?”  
“Look, man. I’m sorry but I really don’t know shit.”  
“Answer the question please; did you look inside?”  
“Hell no I didn’t! I’m not some creep who goes around spying on other peoples’ trash.”  
“Except that wasn’t trash, Mr. Webb, was it?” 

Blake was getting more and more fidgety as the interrogation went on, pacing back and forth in front of the one way mirror as Ash pried into the suspect. Jayden sat at the desk next to the microphone, his teeth gnawing at the nail on his right thumb. His view of the interrogation room was momentarily blocked as Blake paced before the mirror again. They had been working overtime the last few days, their latest case wearing heavily on both of them.

The body of a little girl, only five years old, had been found murdered in the woods near a playground on the edge of town. She had been strangled with what they had identified as a leather belt. A silent agreement had been reached between the two of them the very second they stepped onto the crime scene: They were not stopping until this was solved.

Jayden was pretty damn sure he couldn’t sleep anyway, not when the images of the small body, bruised and tossed away like a broken doll, kept rushing through his mind. Crime scenes were never pleasant, but when kids were involved? Yeah, it had been a fucking awful sight. Their leads had led them to the man who was now sitting opposite of Ash, hands cuffed to the table and expression blank. Following Ash’s last question the man just shrugged, gaze averted as he felt silent.

“We’re not getting any-fucking-where with this shit,” the lieutenant growled, turning on his heel and stomping from the room. Jayden didn’t have the energy or the willpower to stop him. If anything it might be easier for him to concentrate now that his view of the interrogation wasn’t being obstructed every five seconds. Whatever frustration fuelled temper tantrum Blake was having, there were more important things to do.    

“The clothes you burned were stained with your step-daughter’s blood,” Ash tried again, showing the man before him some more pictures. “Whether conscious or not you were getting rid of evidence.”  
Mr. Webb slowly turned his head to look at the pictures, almost immediately averting his eyes again. “It’s that stupid bitch,” he hissed through his teeth, “too selfish to look after her own fucking child properly.”  
“You are talking about Ms. Jones? Your ex-girlfriend?”   
“Of course I am. Should have taken better care of her kid.”  
“What makes you say that?”

Again the conversation died, Jayden slowly getting up from the chair and opting to sit on the edge of the table instead. Blake was right in the end: There were getting nowhere. Both caretakers of the child were busy pointing the finger at each other, and the messy breakup they had gone through only three days prior did none of them any favours. It made Jayden feel sick. He knew all too well that sorrow, grief and other kinds of emotional stress could cause people to lash out, it was basically the first page in any psychology book, but both mother and former step-father seemed so tangled up in their hatred towards each other, that it somehow managed to overshadow the fact that a small child had lost her life.

They had several reports from witnesses stating that a known paedophile often visited the playground, but Jayden had known even before they questioned the man, that he had nothing to do with the murder. The guy had been in the middle of a therapy session when the crime occurred, and according to his record he hadn’t touched or otherwise harmed a child for several years now. Jayden’s gut had instantly told him, that this was a dead end: The fact that everyone in the neighbourhood seemed to know of the man made him an all too perfect scape goat. Whoever hurt that poor child knew the paedophile would be there, and had probably been counting on the police arresting him without a second thought.

Blake had of course jumped the gun. It had caused a heavy argument between the two of them, one that Jayden finally ended up winning once the two of them had nearly torn the station apart. It hadn’t done much to stifle Blake’s anger, but at least he had reluctantly allowed Jayden to direct their focus elsewhere.

Jayden’s mind was torn back to the scene before him, when the door to the interrogation room burst open. He shouldn’t have been surprised, he realized later with the wisdom provided by hindsight, to see Blake stomping into the room. The air around the lieutenant was menacing as always, his eyes fixed on the cuffed man at the table. A wide, Cheshire like grin spread on Ash’s face, a shadow settling across the otherwise gentle man’s eyes, glinting with darkness as he slowly stood.

Without a word the two officers looked at each other, Ash given Blake a short nod before he exited, leaving the suspect alone with Blake. Jayden felt as if he had been bolted in place, his legs heavy and stiff as his feet sunk into the floor. His sense of alarm slowly grew stronger and stronger in his chest, as Blake began pacing the front of the desk rather than sitting. Ethan Mars’ face flashed before Jayden’s eyes. He bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to cause the taste of copper to spread in his mouth. Blake was his partner, his _lover_ as his mind helpfully supplied surely he ought to have more trust in the man than this. It seemed ludicrous that he felt comfortable trusting the man with his body but not with a suspect.

A jolt rushed down along his spine when Ash entered the backroom and the door creaked softly on its hinges. “It won’t be long now,” the other man sighed deeply, strolling up to the camera and fiddling with a few buttons.    
“What do you mean?” Jayden asked and reluctantly looked away from Blake. There was some truth to the saying ‘out of sight out of mind’ he dully noted, feeling the tension in his body bleed away the longer his attention was focused elsewhere. He swallowed dryly at the thought.  
“They always talk when Blake gets his hands on them,” Ash answered with a hum, yawning as he took a seat in Jayden’s abandoned chair, “no matter how difficult they’ve been to crack for everyone else, he always makes ‘em ‘fess up to the truth.”  
“Maybe because he beats the confessions out of them.”  
“He gets results,” Ash shrugged, pinning Jayden against the one way mirror with a calculating look, “does it really matter how? Surely you would rather have the bastard who hurt the kid behind bars than save some scum a couple of bruises?”

Jayden closed his eyes and rubbed at his temples. This was almost an exact replica of his conversation with Captain Perry from back when Blake was beating the life out of Ethan Mars. Was everyone on this goddamn station a freaking psychopath?! Of course he wanted the person responsible to stand trial, but that did not mean that he was ready to break several laws to get it; the end did not justify the means no matter how the issue was presented. Not to mention that evidence gathered through violence would never get approved at court and the whole thing would have been for nothing anyway! He was about to open his mouth and say as much, when a loud thud resounded through the room. He allowed himself a second to breath, grudgingly turning back around. Mr. Webb was lying on the floor next to the upturned table, Blake silently towering over the other man.

The world was in a blur until he found himself standing in the interrogation room with both hands planted on Blake’s shoulders, “Blake, stop it!” he shoved the man backwards against the wall, turning around on his heel to check if their suspect had sustained any injuries.  
He had only turned about halfway, however, when he was pulled backwards against the wall himself, Blake hissing at him through clenched teeth. “This fucking shit again?! Get the hell out of here, Jayden!”  
“God damnit, I will not stand by and let you beat him up!”  
“Fuck off, _Norman_! This guy knows something and I’ll get it out of him no matter what.”  
“You have no evidence that suggest that he’s-”  
“Why don’t you go back to your fucking profiles, FBI?” Blake whispered darkly, Jayden able to feel the lieutenant’s breath on his face.

He felt the warmth radiate from within him, blood boiling in his veins. In an effort to control himself he folded his hands into fists at his sides, nails digging into the soft flesh of his palm. Blake wasn’t going to get the satisfaction of seeing him riled up again, not this time. Without looking down to check he knew his knuckles were slowly turning white. Using the few inches he had on the older male, Jayden pushed himself off the wall, meeting Blake’s glare unflinching.

“Why don’t you actually _help_ with the investigation for a change, instead of playing alpha dog? Or perhaps you would rather I solve this on my own, like when _I_ saved Shaun Mars?”  
“What did you say you fucking asshole?!” Blake roared, something Jayden couldn’t quite pin point shifting in the other’s expression, “that’s fucking rich coming from a druggie who obsessed about playing hero all the fucking time!”  
“Fuck you, Carter! I did everything I could to be civil with you but you kept acting like a fucking unstable maniac throughout the entire investigation!”  
“You know what you are, Norman? You are nothing but a fucking self-promoting, idiotic coward. First you cry like a little bitch for shooting Nathaniel and then you go alone, without saying shit to me, to question Jackson Neville? The only thing you fucking cared about was those fucking glasses of yours, waltzing in here and expecting everyone to do your bidding so that you and the FBI could be fucking heroes!”  
“Fuck you, I didn’t owe you anything! I went to Mad Jack alone because you hadn’t been any help, not even one fucking time! And it is pretty freaking easy to be a hero if all it takes is not beating my suspects until they pass out!”   
“Shut your fucking mouth, Jayden! This is exactly why everyone here just _barely_ tolerates your fucking ass! Always so high and mighty, _little Mr. FBI never does anything wrong._ You would rather sit back and watch more innocents die than man up and do something about it!”

It felt like déjà vu when Jayden’s right fist collided with Blake’s nose. He saw himself standing in that exact same spot only a few months prior, Ethan Mars lying limply on the table top to his left. His heart sped up as he went through the following motions in his mind, trying to prepare himself for when Blake would pull out his gun. If he was quick enough he could probably manage to force the weapon from his grasp…

Except things didn’t go like they had the time before; there was no gun being drawn, no angry words or growls. Instead all that resounded in the interrogation room, after the sound of fist against bone dissipated, was a silence so loud that it felt near strangling in its oppression. _Geez, this is an abusive relationship_. The thought came dashing by uninvited and somewhat untimely given the situation, but it still made him physically flinch. Shit, this was the third time he had hit Blake. Maybe the other man wasn’t the only one with anger issues… 

Hesitant he looked up to meet Blake’s eyes, feeling his throat twisting into a knot when he noticed the blank expression on the other man’s face. Anger, frustration, smugness, satisfaction, lust, and the glint of ‘douchbaggery’ right before a teasing jab: He had come to know all of those emotions on Blake’s face, but this time he felt an icy stab in his abdomen when he tried to recognize the micro expressions in the closed off face and came up short. He barely recognized Ash’s voice when the detective called to them from the doorway, opting to take over once again.

*

They didn’t speak the rest of the day. Blake returned to his desk and Jayden stayed in his office, body twisting in restlessness as his mind worked. The way Blake’s eyebrows had been drawn together slightly, the tug of his lips… Had it looked something akin to dismay?

The remaining hours of the work day dragged on for what felt like several days, Jayden’s body only more fidgety when it was finally time to go home. Somehow he hadn’t thought about the tension between the two of them once they returned home to Blake’s house. How in the world could something so obvious come as a surprise for him?! But then again, why should he be the one to feel awkward about this? He had been in the right, after all; Blake had yet again abused his power as an officer and Jayden had stopped him. Yes he had done the right thing.

However, if that was true then why did he keep seeing Blake’s blank expression as if the image had been painted on the inside of his eyelids? With a deep sigh Jayden remained where he was, figuring that if he just waited long enough the man would drive home without him. Once it was late he could take a taxi and sneak inside to sleep on the couch… Except he didn’t have a key. _Damnit_.

Briefly he considered just sleeping outside or maybe rent a car and sleep there, but one look on the calendrer which proudly presented the word December to him, quickly made him write off the thought. He supposed he could always just stay here at the station, but then again he would prefer to sleep properly so he would be able to, hopefully, tackle this situation better in the morning. Looking up at the clock on the far of wall Jayden sighed deeply once again; 15 minutes past.    
“Are ya going to sit there all night or are ya coming?” Blake was leaning against the doorframe to the broom closet-turned-office, his expression still kept carefully neutral.

The ride home in the car was filled with the same strangling silence, tension between them thick enough to be cut. Jayden kept fidgeting with his hands, unsure what to really do with himself. He kept pondering on the look on Blake’s face, now added together with the fact that the older male had waited for him, and actually gone to get him when he didn’t show on his own, rather than leaving him behind at the station. Several times along the ride he opened his mouth to speak, but all his carefully thought out words refused to form on his tongue.

He kept battling the need to apologize and the voice in the back of his head that insisted that he shouldn’t since he had been right in stopping Blake. The internal fight occupied his thoughts until he suddenly found himself standing before the front door, watching as Blake swung open the door and walked inside. It seemed like a mockery how warm and comfortable Blake’s house seemed, _homely_. Shame twisted around in his chest, his throat still tight and body restless. Maybe it was about time he moved out. That had been the idea to begin with; he would crash on Blake’s sofa for a few weeks until he found an apartment and moved his stuff here form Washington. It had been about three months now, though, and he hadn’t exactly stayed on the couch. A blush shot up in his cheeks as he noted that his suitcase was even lying in the bedroom, wide open and uncharacteristically messy.  

Damnit, he had to make this right. “Carter? I-“  
“Shut up.” Warm hands tangled in his hair, his face being yanked forwards forcefully into rough lips, teeth immediately scraping along his bottom lip. Trying to understand exactly what was going on, Jayden wiggled in the other man’s grab, gasping for air as he managed to pry his head to the side. An angry huff sounded from the lieutenant as he simply grasped Jayden by the chin, forcing his face back into the bruising kiss.

Whining weakly Jayden continued to struggle. His body was eagerly reacting to the other male, but he couldn’t let this go any further until they had talked everything through. Warmth rushed through him as the palm of a hand met his ass, squeezing him painfully tight through his pants. Electric fuelled anger overtook him, his body shuddering in want as all the tension from the interrogation room returned.  
“A-Asshole-!” he groaned in pain as he felt teeth sink deep into his bottom lip, this time meeting the kiss willingly.

The energy in the kiss, the warmth in his body and the anger in his blood; it all reminded him of the first time they had been tangled up in each other like this. Their tongues fought each other as their bodies pushed together and the taste of copper invaded Jayden’s mouth, the two of them practically falling onto the couch in a tangled mess of limbs. “Clothes. Off. Now.” Jayden groaned, voice edging on spiteful despite its breathless state.  
“I said _shut up_ ,” Blake growled thrusting his tongue back into the agent’s mouth. Hands were roaming and tearing at clothes, buttons flying as they were ripped from their threads.  
The other’s words made a shudder rush through Jayden’s body, the warmth in his body only growing as a poisonous bitterness settled within him. “Make me!”

Blake’s nails dug into Jayden’s hips as he was quickly turned onto his stomach, face slammed forwards into the couch cushions. Jayden hissed and cursed against the soft fabric as he felt his pants and boxers being jerked down his tights. A part of him almost wished that his body hadn’t reacted so strongly to Blake already, just so he could take pride in knowing that he didn’t obey the other blindly. As it were, however, his body was already shivering and hard with want.

He forced his lips together as tightly as possible to keep from moaning in pain as the first finger entered him. Thankfully Blake had been nice enough to coat the finger in saliva first, though it still was a somewhat inadequate lubricant. Jayden barely had time to breath before the finger was rammed inside of him at a bruising pace, small whimpers managing to tear their way through his lips, despite his best effort at muffling them against the pillows. Barely any time went by before the second finger was added too, a sudden rush of blinding pleasure shooting through Jayden’s body as Blake graced his prostate.

He could practically hear the shit eating grin spread on Blake’s face as the older male kept thrusting his fingers into him, making sure to avoid going anywhere near the sensitive bundle of nerves. Jayden growled in frustration, adrenaline fueling his actions as he fought against Blake’s grip and managed to get his right arm free from where it had been crushed under his body. Without a second thought he swung his elbow backwards as hard as he could, satisfaction blossoming in his chest as he heard Blake curse in pain. Quickly he wiggled away from the other and turned back around on his back, mouth open to shoot another string of curses at the lieutenant, before Jayden simply-… stopped.

 A weak moan spilled from his lips as he met Blake’s eyes, dark blues filled with lust and tenderness. Somehow that look made his body heat up even more than his quickly dissolving anger. He didn’t think when he stretched out his arms, silently begging for Blake to move closer. Half discarded clothes still hung around their bodies, shirts torn and pants thrown in a random direction. It was messy, it was complicated, it was _them_.

Soft moans and groans of pleasure melted together as Blake entered his body, the feeling of being stretched and filled making stars form at the edges of Jayden’s vision. He knew that he probably wasn’t going to last very long, the stress from the day and the need to have Carter close making the whole thing overwhelming. He clung to the other’s body as they made love to each other, bodies pliable and gentle as they met in each thrust.

Jayden was shaking all over, his tights clamped tightly around Blake’s waist in a desperate attempt to push the other closer, deeper. Blake kept enough distance between them so that he could look at Jayden’s face, trying to burn everything into his mind. The younger man’s eyes were squeezed shut, cheeks a deep shade of pink and eyebrows drawing closer together as more and more pleasure built inside of his body.  When Blake found that particularly sensitive spot inside of Jayden once again, he ached his body off the couch with a hitching groan, incoherent words falling form his hips in a steady stream as he whimpered and begged for more. “Cartah _ah_ \- _So good_ -!”  
“F-Fuck- Norm! Hah, you’re so beautiful,” he growled back, hips eagerly snapping against Jayden’s quivering body.

Broken moans kept falling from Jayden’s lips, his body tightening until he felt like he might pass out from the tension in his body. Blake thrusted into him particularly hard, hitting his prostate head on and making him yelp, his walls tightening around the other man as he came. Blake’s name kept spilling from Jayden’s lips deliciously as the older man followed him over the edge, their hips pushing against each other as they rode out the last waves of pleasure together.

Jayden felt lightheaded as they snuggled together in the aftermath, hands lazily rubbing circles into every available piece of skin. A feeling of fizziness spread in his chest and made him feel like chuckling.  
“Hey, Carter?” he called softly, letting his fingers slide through said man’s dark hair.  
“M’yeah?” the lieutenant mumbled against Jayden’s chest.  
“Those things I said, you know, before… I didn’t mean them,” he admitted in a whisper into the dark, relieve mixing with the sated pleasure in his body.    
After a brief beat of silence he felt Blake shake his head against his chest. “I’m the one who-… I didn’t mean the things I said either…”  
“We’re a bunch of idiots,” he mumbled suddenly feeling shy.  
“Speak for yourself, asshole.” The gentle huff of air against his skin caused his stomach to do a pleasant jump. They would have to discuss Blake's use of violence eventually, but right now Jayden figured it could wait.  
“Alright; I’m an idiotic asshole and you are a mean, old bastard,” he hummed in amusement.  
“Damn straight.”


	8. Audience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Audience 
> 
> Tags for this chapter: Public Display of Affection, groping, groping in public, groping during briefing, 'Blake is amused, Jayden is confused and Perry has had enough of their shit'
> 
> I've been without internet for a few days which is the reason for this chapter being sligthly delayed. I am back now, however, and if everything goes well I'll have a short, extra chapter ready and up by tomorrow! (๑￫ܫ￩)  
> Hope you are all doing well and please enjoy! <3

 

**AUDIENCE**

 

Blake grabbed Jayden’s hand while they were listening to Perry performing one of his never-ending monologues. It was a mixed briefing; starting with a supposedly inspiring spiel about staying vigilant over the holidays as crime usually increased around December, and ending with details about some  serial burglar that everyone was to keep an eye out for. All in all, pretty uneventful and rather boring stuff.   

Jayden had been engrossed in taking notes, trying to gather enough clues to piece together a possible profile on the thief and therefor he hadn’t noticed the other man reaching out. The touch was light; rough fingers brushing against the back of his hand, rubbing gentle circles into his skin. It caused a rush to go through the agent’s body, his eyes leaving the pacing Perry and instead turning towards his partner.

Blake pointedly ignored him, turning his body away slightly while pretending to follow along with whatever Perry was telling them. Jayden knew him well enough to notice the slight glimmer of mischief on the other’s face, however, the lieutenant’s mouth tugged upwards at the corners and a dark hue in the blue eyes as they observed Jayden through their peripheral vision.

Worrying his bottom lip between his teeth, Jayden hesitantly turned his attention back to the captain. He was ever thankful that they just so happened to choose two chairs behind a table, the piece of furniture hiding the way that Blake still caressed his hand.  A few seconds passed before he returned the soothing gesture, letting his fingers stroke against Blake’s as well.  

They had agreed to keep their _entanglement_ a secret at work, both worried (though mostly Jayden) that it would make them seem incompetent. It had been risky enough getting each other off against the wall in his office at the very beginning of their relationship; something that they could not risk doing again. If anyone walked in on them and rumors started spreading it would only be a matter of time before the press would be all over it like female dogs in heat. It was bad enough that Ash kept giving him an odd look, though that might just have been his mind playing tricks on him in his slight paranoia.

However, although they had both agreed to keep a low profile, Blake was now pushing the boundaries of said agreement with a carefree air.    

Desperate for something to do, he cleared his throat despite not really needing to, shifting slightly in his seat. His mind began circling around the reasons behind Blake’s sudden display of affection, but all possible conclusions caused heat to spread in Jayden’s cheeks. His teeth on his bottom lip slowly became gentler, Jayden momentarily lost in thoughts of Blake’s lips against his own. It was almost too easy to recall the pressure and taste of the other male; demanding and warm, forcing the reins out of Jayden’s hands with each stroke of his tongue, until the older male was in complete control and his presence consumed Jayden’s thoughts completely. Bodies tangled together, clothes ripped off by shaking fingers and skin touched by eager mouths.

 Despite their conflicting personalities and the rather explosive tempers that inhabited them both, they somehow managed to find the perfect balance between demanding and… Gentle. _Caring_ his mind added, the room suddenly feeling colder than it had before as Jayden felt the drumming behind his ribs picking up its pace.

With an admittedly slightly shaky intake of breath Jayden muttered a curse, angry with himself for letting his mind wander. Even if he and Blake hadn’t technically been assigned to deal with the break-ins he wanted to do something in order to help out. Maybe it would even make his colleagues think a little less… Well, _less_ , of him.     

Willing his attention back to Perry, he was somewhat relieved that the briefing had continued undisturbed. As much as he hated the fact that he might have lost some important data, it was a small blessing that his earlier daydreaming had gone unnoticed. Especially when said daydreaming had included a mindless self-inflicted state of beginning arousal.     

 _Fuckin- I’m not a goddamn teenager anymore!_ he groaned internally, trying his best to calm the red heat in his cheeks. It was honestly humiliating how easily Blake got under his skin, and to make matters worse the lieutenant was more than aware of this. He was an agent of the FBI, a professional, with a degree in psychology and criminology, graduated first of his class with straight A s; and yet here he was reduced to a blushing high schooler experiencing his first crush! 

Perhaps this was exactly what Blake was playing at; trying to humiliate him in front of the whole station now that his being there had finally been somewhat accepted. Reaching up to slide a hand through his gelled hair, he used the movement to conceal the glare he threw towards the man besides him.

 Blake met his eyes with an air of laziness and confidence that made Jayden’s blood boil. _Just who the hell did he think-!_ But fine, he huffed, a smirk forming on his face despite his best efforts to keep it down. Two could play at that game. From the corner of his eye he saw the smile on Blake’s face slowly falter, a wrinkle forming in the middle of the lieutenant’s forehead.   

Unrestrained Jayden sat up fully in his chair, a small crack coming from the muscles in his back. He moaned deeply at the feeling, low enough so that only Blake could hear him, and continued to twist his body around in a stretch. Brining his chin down slightly, Jayden fixed the other with a half lidded gaze, slowly rolling his hips down against the chair, disguised as part of his stretching. 

The action had the desired effect, the lieutenant’s eyes drawn to the agent’s hips instantly, his Adams apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. A small flash of victory must have shown on Jayden’s face, because Blake quickly averted his gaze again. It was difficult to know for certain because of the goatee but he could have sworn he saw a slight redness crawl up across the older man’s neck. Satisfied with his small success Jayden settled back into his chair, bringing his notebook back up in front of him. That should probably be enough to teach Blake to back off while they were at work. _0 – 1 for me!_

He nearly gasped out loud when he felt warmth against his lower back. Perry shot him an unfriendly glare from his position in front of the slideshow, Jayden holding up a hand in apology as he tried to mask the sound as a cough.

Blake’s hand pulled the back of the agent’s shirt free from his pants, the skin on Jayden’s lower back already feeling prickly in anticipation. This little game of theirs was highly inappropriate, his mouth opening to tell Blake as much, but all that left was a soft sigh, as the hand finally made contact. He really couldn’t believe himself, sharp shame twisting in his gut as he felt his member twitch. Blake caressed his back in lazy strokes, fingers dipping just slightly under his waistband before sliding back up along his spine.

Normally it would have made Jayden purr in delight, but with his eyes still focused on Perry he managed to swallow the sound into a shiver. Once more he thanked all the possible gods he could remember for the invention of tables.  
“Blake, stop it,” he whispered in the air between him and his partner, leaning further into the touch despite his words.  
“Hmm? Whaddya mean?” Blake said easily, his hands withdrawing only to slide down the younger’s thigh, thumb drawing random patterns against the fabric of his jeans. Jayden sighed and moved around a bit in his chair, caught between pleasure and awkwardness. He probably shouldn’t have been as surprised as he was, when the hand shifted further downwards and tightly cupped the front of his pants.

His restraint temporarily breaking, Jayden moaned out softly, his hips shuddering in want. Blake kept his hand in its position alternating between how much pressure he put against Jayden’s groin, feeling the agent up without actually moving. It was driving him mad; the warmth from the hand seeping through his clothes easily and the shifting force behind each push against him making his senses hold their breath in keenness.

“Blake,” he whispered again, looking up from the tabletop only to lock eyes with a knowing stare. The amused look on Ash‘s face did nothing to lessen the shame that nearly made Jayden slip from his chair. If anything the smile only seemed to widen, Ash pressing his lips firmly together as if to keep something in.

 Jayden was locked in place by his own revulsion, a look of horror slowly overtaking his features as reality hit him. He had forgotten to stifle his moan. And Ash had heard. _Ash knew!_ Next to him, Blake was still wearing his unflinching poker face, though a slight twitch at the edge of his lips indicated his amusement. Jayden bitterly wished that he had kept some vial of tripto: The thought of OD’ing seemed quite compelling in that very moment.

His dark thoughts must have shown on his face, because no sooner had Ash shifted his gaze from Blake and back at the agent, before the lieutenant’s friend finally burst into laughter. Or perhaps something akin to a hyena going into amused hysteria would be a more fitting way of describing the outburst.

Perry stopped in his briefing midsentence, his eyes storming with anger from being interrupted. He quickly located Ash, the man leaning across a nearby table to prevent himself from falling over, his body convulsing in choked up laughter. The captain’s eyes flew to the horrified expression on Jayden’s face next, and then took note of Blake’s blank and calm demeanor. Even without his past as a detective on the force, Perry put two and two together quickly. Hell, even a goddamn toddler could see that the two men weren’t paying attention. Whatever the hell they had been doing that was so funny that it made detective Ash laugh, he sure hoped it was worth it: “Jayden. Lieutenant. Leave. Now.”

The Captain’s voice left no room for negotiation, so while Ash forced his face back into seriousness Blake stood and practically dragged Jayden out of the room with him. The agent noted jealously that his lover wasn’t nursing a raging boner. Of course, all the humiliation had to be all his. Blake was probably never going to stop teasing him about this.

Halfway through the door Jayden cast a glance over his shoulder, thankful that no one seemed to have noticed the state of his body. He did, however, catch the gaze of Ash once again. The detective mouthed something to him, and as Blake almost impatiently closed the door behind them, Jayden knew that he would never, ever, be able to look Ash in the eye again.


	9. Extra: Christmas Drabbles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little different than the others since it’s actually just three short drabbles xD  
> With the holidays being upon us, I had the urge to write a few 'everyday images' if ya will of Blake and Jayden stumbling through the Christmas preparations. 
> 
> Merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa and everything in between to all of you!! <3

**CHRISTMAS DRABBLES**

*****

Norman could count the times he had been alone in a kitchen on one hand. He told himself that he had a fairly good idea of _how_ to cook; it was just that whenever he tried to do it things always seemed to go wrong… In the exploding or catching on fire kind of way. This time, however, he was determined to succeed or die trying, which, in all honesty, might be a very real risk he was taking.   

With both of them being on the police force most evenings were spend with varying take away containers in their laps as they watched the TV. It was hardly healthy, but Carter had countered his protests with a poke against his forehead and a knowing smirk on his lips; “it’s still better than _not_ eating like you usually do.” Reluctantly he had to admit that the older man had a point.

The station had been especially busy these past weeks with the holidays coming up shortly, and their respective schedules had been tossed into the air and jumbled beyond recognition. It was already only about two days a week that the two of them got off work at the same time, and now with the extra workload and steady flow of cases it was rare that their schedules matched up at all. Despite living together he had realized that he had actually missed the other man these past few weeks.

Today was the golden exception to the rule, however, as Blake was scheduled to get off around eight that evening. Jayden had been home since about five, which gave him plenty of time to plan and gather everything that was needed for his surprise.

Several times that day he had questioned himself on the sanity of this idea, wondering if it was too sappy and embarrassing. Surely doing something like this was about as close to a screaming declaration of love as one could get without using words. Of course he knew that he was in love with Blake, crazy as it sounded, but there was something so incredibly domestic about this particular act that made him fidget with nerves. Or perhaps it was just fear of how furious Blake would be when he returned to a rubble of burning ashes were his house used to be.

The whole thing had been brought about by a casual remark the older male had made one evening. They had just finished yet another case and determined to celebrate they had both admittedly gotten a bit too much to drink.  Blake was usually rather reclusive when it came to talking about his family and his childhood, preferring to not graze the subject at all. Enough alcohol to knock a horse unconscious, however, made him open right up.

 “We never really did much for the holidays.” Blake was resting his head against the armrest of the couch while Jayden slumped down on top on him in a tangled mess of limbs. “My mother wasn’t one for tradition so although we had a tree and gifts and shit we never really decorated the house and stuff. I remember this one year,” he slurred with a throaty cackling, the shake that ran through his body making Jayden lift his head from where it lay against the other’s stomach. “She tried to bake a cake and the thing came out of the oven looking like a goddamn burn victim. My sister fed some of it to the neighbour’s dog, and the poor creature got so sick it stayed in its basket for 24 fucking hours!” Thinking of the poor dog had made Blake laugh until he started wheezing, the sound contagious enough to make Jayden laugh too.

Hearing Blake speak of things like this was not unlike opening a treasure chest: It was never fully obvious what would be inside but regardless of the prize, the excitement from not knowing added to the pure thrill of having found the key to begin with, were enough to make Jayden breathless. He wished that he had restrained himself a bit more that particular night, wanting to burn everything about the situation into his mind.

The story had made him think, though. Despite Blake shrugging it off and stating that he really didn’t care much about Christmas, it still seemed like such a shame and… Well, rather lonely in a way. Regardless of what you celebrated, if anything at all, surely what made winter time enjoyable was how it caused people to gather a little closer together to the people they cared about.  _Ah, shit, this really is sentimental and foolish_.

Pulling a face he turned his attention back to the chilled dough in the bowl before him, rolling up his sleeves as he eyed the rolling pin. Madison had been kind enough to let him borrow an assortment of cookie cutters, having already finished baking for the year. “Or at least until Shaun and Ethan get to the bottom of the cookie jar,” she had shrugged with a wink as she handed them to him.

The metal was shaped in the form of various species of dinosaurs, a few cars, reindeers and a lone duck; obviously things that Shaun enjoyed. Overlooking the reindeer they were hardly Christmas themed, but somehow that seemed appropriate for what would be Blake’s first experience with homemade sugar cookies.

The whole house looked like a battlefield when Blake returned home, but the cookies and the heavy blush on Jayden’s face almost made up for it.

 

*****

Opening his front door and shrugging off his coat, Carter let out a sigh of relieve. He was about ready to fall straight into bed and sleep for the rest of the year, stalking through his kitchen and living room in search of a certain agent. Maybe he could convince Norman to tug him into bed and… _Well_ … If he managed to charm the kid out of his pants, he sure wouldn’t mind pinning the younger to their bed and have his way with him for a couple of hours.

A grin spread on his lips as he walked down the hallway, freezing in his tracks when the soft sound of Jayden humming emitted from the bathroom. It was that fucking _stupid fucking song again_.

For what had to be the hundredth time that December, he asked himself just who the fuck had decided to make Christmas music sound like the most obnoxious thing in the fucking world. The stores had been blaring seasonal music about Santa from their speakers, even before Halloween and Thanksgiving were properly over, and he could hardly turn on the radio in his car without immediately feeling the need to crash into something. Surely this had to be a more efficient source of agony than even being put through water torture.

If they only changed it up a bit it probably wouldn’t be so bad, but Carter swore that he haunted somehow.  It didn’t matter where or when; the second he turned on the radio or went grocery shopping he was met with the sound of the warm female voice begging him to be hers for Christmas. Every goddamn time it was always the same exact song. It was goddamn infuriating.

The tune wasn’t even that bad to be honest, and most days he would have teased Jayden for how soft his singing voice sounded. This time though? He muttered a curse underneath his breath, turning on his heal and stomping back into the kitchen. He needed a beer, he deserved a beer. As he opened the fridge and searched around, he didn’t notice how his lips moved on their own accord, moving along to the faint echo of Jayden’s voice.  

“'Cause I just want you here tonight  
Holding on to me so tight  
What more can I do  
Baby all I want for Christmas is you.”

 

*****

Blake had insisted that now since they were doing this whole ‘Christmas thing’ they needed lights. It was easy enough to decorate one of the smaller trees and a nearby bush with the chain of tiny LEDs, but by the time that was done Blake eyed the front garden with a frown.

Jayden grumbled slightly when the lieutenant declared that they also needed lights along the edge of the roof, already feeling cold and a bit tired. Blake was unwavering, however, and while Jayden went to grab another sweater (although he already wore enough to make his body look twice as big as usual), the older male cleared away enough snow to secure the ladder on the ground. As it turned out it wasn’t difficult to arrange the chain on the roof, their job done surprisingly quickly. The real issue came when they plugged the cord into the socket.

It took about four hours, lots of swearwords and many broken, tiny bulbs to finally locate and replace the one that had blown and caused the others to not light up. They both vowed that this was the one and only time they would ever do this, but as the days went on Jayden noticed how a smile would tug at Blake’s lips whenever they returned home in the evening and the timer that was attached to the cord had lit up the small house in a warm, yellowy glow.

They put the lights back up every single year.


	10. Priority

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Priority  
> Tags for this chapter: House search, investigation, very very light fear, fluff 
> 
> I'm back! Hope ya'll had a wonderful time during the holidays ʕ￫ᴥ￩ʔ ❤️  
> To be honest I'm a bit unsure how to tag this chapter properly, as something along the line of 'awkward fluff' sounds... Well, awkward! But oh well, I hope you'll enjoy regardless!
> 
> ( Also; is any of you have a word or a specific situation that you would like for me to write about, then please do not hesitate to tell me! C: )

 

**PRIORITY**

**  
**

 

The stink of piss and rot were the first to hit his nostrils and then an industrial scent of chemicals slowly crept through the strong smells and made the mixture even more nauseating.

Blake had to remind himself to keep breathing through the sting in his nose as he instinctively recoiled and his windpipe scrunched up. Briefly his mind lingered on what kind of residue was left in the stale air around him, but when his stomach lurched at the mere thought he forced himself to think of something else.

Ash and Jayden entered after him, the smell making them both falter in their steps. Ash clasped a hand over his mouth as a low, guttural hurling sound emanated from his chest. A taunting remark was ready at the tip of Blake’s tongue but he decided against it. He honestly couldn’t claim to be dealing with the stench much better himself. Next to him Jayden was looking pale as ever, blue eyes doe like in their round expression of disgust.

With a stiff nod the three men split up, rummaging through the house in different directions. Blake stalked down the hallway, hearing the floorboards creak softly as Ash entered the kitchen and Jayden made his way up the narrow stairs.

Condensation was running down the walls in thick drops, a heavy layer of dust lying in disturbed piles against the floorboards. Someone had definitely been here recently alright. The house remained eerily quiet as he advanced into one of the bedrooms. The fainted, pink wallpaper instantly revealed this to have once belonged to a child. Among the walls he spotted several pictures of baby animals and cartoon characters, though most other traces of innocence had long since been destroyed in the scattering of furniture and what looked suspiciously like a campfire in the middle of the ransacked room.

The next bedrooms were in much the same state of disarray. The few tables and dressers that had still to be destroyed were stuffed full of dirty clothes, empty alcohol bottles and several orange, see through cylinders containing pills. All unlabelled. In a drawer further down he found a mess of syringes, some used and other still in their packaging. He made sure not to touch anywhere near any of them.

The upside was that his part of the house alone contained more than enough evidence to put the resident drug dealers under arrest, but as the silence in the house continued, he began feeling a prickly sensation against his neck. The patrol that had been stationed to stakeout the house had seen the members of the gang enter, but while there were plenty of traces of living in the house, it seemed thoroughly abandoned. Cursing under his breath he put his gun back into its holster. Damnit, had they noticed the parked car across the street? Or had they slid out through a back entrance somewhere when they heard them break down the door?

Circling back down the hallway he was met with Ash, the other officer shaking his head in responds to the unanswered question that hung in the air between them. With a grimace Blake turned towards the staircase, letting a hand slide through his hair as the thought of having lost their suspects entered his mind. Fucking hell, they had been so close he just knew it!

The sound of his teeth scraping together was nearly enough to drown out the sound of the pained yelp. Instantly every muscle within him was pulled taut. He took the stairs two steps at the time, flinging his body forwards in a frantic chase. Sounds of a scuffle ensued as he approached the first floor, nearly tripping against a discarded piece of cloth on one of the stairs. He could hear Ash breathing heavily behind him.

“Jayden?!” A body crashed harshly into both of them, arms flailing and legs kicking to get past. The force of the impact was nearly enough to knock Blake off his feet, his proximity to the wall being what saved him from falling on his ass in the end.

Everything slowed down around him as he looked over his shoulder, the dark figure escaping down the stairs. His gaze shifted to Ash who had been knocked down slightly, his movements stiff and slow as he regained his balance. If Blake didn’t react soon, their suspect would be getting away; he was already at the foot of the stairs. He knew full well that their best chance of catching him was now, together; the longer he hesitated the more likely it seemed that the whole endeavour had been for naught.

 They would be set back several steps; knowing more or less who their suspects were but not being able to locate them.

 The choice was an obvious one, the situation only having one correct answer. Except it wasn’t obvious. He had heard Jayden yelp out in pain, heard the fighting, and the younger had still to show. Images of Jayden in a pool of blood flashed before his eyes.

His mind broke down as he, unable to think about the situation for even a second longer, continued his jerky motions up the stairs.  
“Shit! ASH! GO!” He bellowed over his shoulder as he ran his voice rough and cracking as it formed the command. He heard Ash take off behind the suspect, a burning sensation settling in his lungs as he allowed himself to focus on throwing open any and every door within his reach.

Jayden was sitting against an old couch in the room furthest down the hall, his gun thrown across the room and shirt torn.

The immediate relieve was replaced by anger almost instantly. Had Blake been able to read Jayden’s mind (an ability the lieutenant often wished he had) he would have found it amusing how Jayden decided to view his demeanour like that of a starved, pissed off bear. However, he was not a mind reader, and as his eyes scanned across the younger male’s body and zoomed in on where he was clutching the side of his stomach, the anger simply flared into a roaring fire.

“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!”  
Jayden made a face and Blake knew him well enough to expect an overly dramatic eye roll followed by a sentence about something utterly idiotic. Instead, however, all Jayden could muster this time was a weak groan in reply.  
“You’re so fucking stupid,” he growled at him as he fell onto his knees, grasping Jayden’s wrist firmly in an effort to force his hand away. Jayden wouldn’t give. Even in his clearly exhausted and pained state, he refused to remove his hand and let Blake survey the damage.  
“It’s nothing. Just help me get up.”  
“What the hell are- I’ll fucking give ya goddamn ‘nothing’! Now let me see.”  
“Get off, Blake, I’m fine.”  
“You are clearly fucking not, Norman! Goddamn shithead getting yourself hurt, how the hell did ya ever getcha badge, fucking kid of a-” he continued swearing into the air between them, calling Jayden every word under the sun until the younger finally relented.

Jayden had been stabbed. The wound was jagged, off its mark, and thankfully not deep enough to have reached anything important. The stabbing asshole must have read about shit like this in a book or something, having clearly aimed for Jayden’s lungs but missed nearly completely.

Blake released a new string of curses as the reality of the situation slowly hit him. He had been within inches of their suspect, close enough to reach out and grab the fucker, but the only thing he had been able to think about in the moment, was this goddamn kid in front of him. He had chosen Jayden before the case. His stomach twisted and turned, his chest feeling too tight for his ribcage. What the fuck had he been thinking? He had never, _ever_ , chosen someone over the case. Getting the suspect behind bars and prevent further innocent people from getting hurt were always the first priority no matter what; it just made more sense to him. Hell, there had even been times in the past where Ash had gotten hurt and rather than checking on him, Blake had continued following the trail and phoned an ambulance mid shootout.

Shit this was bad. Just what the hell had Jayden done to him? He was becoming incompetent and _it was all because of-!_  

“What about-” the agent began, but he had barely begun talking before Blake cut him off again: “Shut up Norman, just concentrate on yourself for fuck’s sake.”  
“It’s really not that bad. It’s just a cut,” the younger pressed on, tilting his head to the side in an attempt to catch Blake’s gaze. He kept his eyes fixed on the wound. Everything seemed to spiral within him without coming anywhere near a way to stop. His anger turned to frustration that turned to confusion that then turned to embarrassment and culminated in even more anger. He hated not knowing exactly how he felt, uncertainty being the very thing he had fought most of his life to avoid. Blake pried himself with being focused and determined in everything he did, but something about Jayden kept shaking everything up. Shit, falling in love with this fucking prick was gonna be the death of him.  

“Blake. Did we get him?”  
The hand on his cheek held firm, not allowing him to pull away when light, greenish blue bore into him.  
“I don’t know,” he answered dumbly, an awkward tension settling between them. Jayden’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, his lips opening and closing rapidly. If Blake didn’t already feel like an idiot he sure did now. Jayden may be young, at least in his eyes, and the kid still hadn’t much in way of field experience, but even so he was capable of handling himself. Shit, he had given Blake a few well-placed punches that proved as much.  

“Come on,” he finally forced out through his teeth as he reached out and helped Jayden stand, “we need to get that wound checked out. What the hell even happened?”  
“I got careless,” Jayden huffed, allowing the other to lead him out into the hall and down the stairs, “I made him drop his gun and went to cuff him, but I forgot to check if he had anything else on him. Heh, guess you are not completely wrong in calling me an idiot.”  
“It was nerves and adrenaline making the decisions,” Blake mumbled back, holding Jayden a bit closer to his side than he needed to, “it happens to everyone sometimes.”

He could feel Jayden’s searching gaze on him, but the rest of the way outside remained silent. 


	11. Domestic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Domestic  
> Tags for this chapter: Babysitting, bad attempts at humor, snowball fight, fluff 
> 
> I am truly sorry for the delay! Life suddenly got awfully busy on my end, my computer decided to delete about half of this chapter, and then I was an idiot who thought bringing my iPad would be easier than bringing my computer, when I had to go visit my parents, so I was forced to rewrite this entire thing in google docs! （´ヘ｀；）  
> Phew... It has been a ride... BUT IT IS FINALLY HERE! I really hope that you all enjoy despite this being a mess ^^" 
> 
> If any of you have any suggestions, be it words or situations, do not hesitate to tell me! Sharing my love for these two idiots gives me life xD 🌻  
> ( I am too frustrated to look for mistakes right now, so as usual I'll come back to it eventually)

 

**DOMESTIC**

 

Jayden exhaled heavily into the cold air, clouds forming in front of his mouth as he pulled his scarf up to cover his nose. He was no stranger to snow, but for the past few mornings the chilly wind of January had been accompanied by a heavy blanket of crispy white on the ground. Blake strolled along next to him, hands buried deep in his coat pockets and a light scowl on his face.

The pair came to a stop in front of a small apartment building, the upper name tag next to the door phone reading MARS in bold letters.  
“I still can’t believe you talked me into this,” Blake huffed next to him, shifting his weight from one feet to the other.  
“I’m not sure I did,” Jayden chuckled softly and pressed the button, a loud obnoxious ringing echoing through the building. “You are just this nice, Carter.”  
“Fuck off, Norman, you owe me one for this.”  
“Really, though. Thanks for doing this with me. I’m no good with children.”  
“And you think I am? Poor kid, this is gonna be chaos.”  
“What’s gonna be chaos?” The door was flung open just as the last words left Blake’s mouth, revealing the slightly pale but warm face of Ethan Mars.  
“Nothing,” Jayden answered quickly, returning Ethan’s smile, “how are you doing Mr. Mars?”

Ethan was clearly surprised to see Blake at first, but after a few seconds he seemed to shrug it off and let both men inside.  
“Please, just Ethan. Well, I have my son back in one piece, that alone should tell you how I am,” he whistled happily as he guided them up the staircase. “Madison told me that you had agreed to look after Shaun, but I didn’t realise Lieutenant Blake would be joining you as well.”  
“No well-”  
“I just ran into him on the way. Got nothing better to do today, so I thought I would pop in and see how the kid was doing,” Blake mumbled in a gruff voice, his body stiff and motions jerky. Jayden noted his body language and realized the other was feeling nervous, perhaps even awkward.

“Mr. Mars, I would like-” Blake began, biting his tongue and hissing in pain before he continued: “I owe you an apology, a real one, not all that media crap... Everything that happened umm-”  
“Mr. Blake,” Ethan interjected gently, turning around and holding up a hand in a signal for him to stop. “Mr. Blake; while it is true that you and i had a few… bumps on the road back then-...” his words halted as he seemed to consider how to formulate whatever he was going to say. “I got my son back, Lieutenant. If you ask me that is the only thing that matters. Everything else might as well not have happened.”  Without waiting for a reply the head of the Mars family turned back around and stalked up the stairs, the air around him calm and content. Jayden couldn’t help but think that he looked like a man who had finally started living for real.

He had already followed the other man a few steps before he realized that Blake wasn’t following. Casting a glance over his shoulder, he saw the lieutenant stand as if frozen in place, a myriad of expressions showing on his face all at once, as if he wasn’t sure which one to settle on. A cold stab of guilt hit Jayden across the face. He had never considered how Blake might have felt back then or how the OK case might have affected the stoic cop.

Blake had likely sealed his emotions away so far within himself, that he even managed to fool everyone around him... Even someone like Jayden who, arguably, should have been able to see through it. He only hesitated for a brief second before he held out his hand. Blake looked at him confused. Then he rushed up the stairs and squeezed the agent’s hand tightly.  
“The main door has gotten into a habit of getting stuck, so recently we’ve had to go down and fetch people,” Ethan explained idly, his voice filling the silence of the stairwell. None of the two men behind him were really paying attention, though.

They held onto each other as they ascended their hands positioned slightly behind them in case Ethan turned around. Jayden wasn’t sure who initiated it, but as they reached the white front door, his own slender fingers had intertwined with Blake’s larger digits. His body felt light and bubbly from the contact, heat rising in his cheeks. They let each other go once Ethan swung open the door to his home, a sorrowful, unuttered sigh circling around in Jayden’s chest.

 

The Mars family lived on the very first floor of the building. Even now in the midst of winter a few beams of stubborn sun managed to glide inside through the large windows, illuminating the home in an orange glow. Jayden wondered how exactly he had been swept into this situation; standing in the Mars family home with the task of babysitting Shaun.

When he first heard someone call his name in the supermarket he figured it was most likely a mother calling for her son. Granted, he didn’t know anyone else who shared his name, but he had been too engrossed in trying to decipher his grocery list to really take much more notice. Mentally he snorted, impressed by how many childish snacks Blake had managed to sneak onto the small piece of paper. His writing stood out clearly against Jayden’s own; bolder and taller, the letters demanding their space very much like the writer himself did.

That was the moment that Madison had placed a hand on his shoulder and made him jolt in surprise. He didn’t remember much of the following conversation, the reporter doing most of the talking. Somehow she weaseled out of him that he was currently staying with Blake, though he kept to the ‘sleeping on the couch’ lie. Or could it be considered a lie when it had at one point been true?

Regardless, their conversation had somehow steered in the direction of both Ethan and Madison being out of town for work next week, leaving Shaun alone for the duration of Saturday. She went on quietly, sighing when she brought up Ethan’s distrust towards anyone and everyone when it came to leaving his son in their care. Of course she understood him perfectly, having trouble with the prospect of leaving the child herself, but sadly they had little choice in the matter. Jayden did distinctly remember that he had expressed a wish to help, though he had to work overtime and wouldn't be able. Somehow Madison seemed to have overlooked the last part entirely. Past Norman had been wise saving those extra vacation days.

How exactly she managed to twist his arm into agreeing he would probably never know for sure. Damn reporters and their tricks.

The whole exchange of ‘good morning’, ‘thank you’, ‘have a wonderful day’ and ‘have fun’ were over in the blink of an eye. The whole thing over so quickly that Jayden, now sitting next to Shaun on the couch as the young boy watched cartoons, felt dizzy and lost for words. He had seen the child quite a few times in the aftermath of the case, letting him tell and ask anything he wanted. Of course the child was already seeing a psychologist, but since Jayden had been the one to pull him from the freezing water he felt it was his responsibility to make sure he was okay. Those sessions were in the past, however.

Looking at Shaun now, there was a soberness in the child’s face that did not belong with someone so young. He was enthralled by the cartoons, but his expression held a calculated seriousness that separated him from the scene: Like an adult, Shaun enjoyed the cartoons for what they were, without any hint of the wonderment and excitement that should normally be present in an 8 year old. Jayden knew it couldn’t be helped; that it was impossible to go through such an ordeal without being changed in some way. That didn’t make the ach in his chest get any better, however, futilely wondering if he by finding Shaun sooner might have saved some of the child within the boy.

“I didn’t know you would be coming too, Mr. Blake."  
“No, well, I ran into Norman and thought I would go see how you were doing.”  
“I’m okay. I still have nightmares,” Shaun muttered, his voice dipping in volume.  
“I’m sorry to hear that, kiddo,” Blake said in a voice that Jayden had never heard before, the agent watching as Blake patted the boy’s head. Apparently he hadn’t been the only one to worry about Shaun following the case.  
“It’s okay,” Shaun shrugged, his gaze shifting back to the TV, “Madison has trouble sleeping sometimes too, so she’s there when I wake up most of the time. She’ll tell me stories until I fall back asleep. I like her; she’s very kind and really pretty! And her stories are way better than dads!”

 

A comfortable silence settled between the three of them, occasionally interrupted by a giggle from Shaun whenever the wolf-like animal in the animated show ran straight past the edge of the cliff. As the wolf’s, who Jayden now recognized to be a coyote, attempts to capture the blue, ostrich-like bird became more and more silly, a choking sounding laugh erupted from the other end of the couch.  
“Enjoying yourself, Carter?”   
“And what if I am, Norman?”  
“Oh, nothing, nothing.” An explosion resounded from the TV as the bird managed to lure the coyote into his own trap. “I am just surprised you would enjoy such childish things.” Shaun looked between the two of them like he was watching a game of tennis, the child eagerly observing and weighting each reaction. A smirk spread on his face as the adults continued, the boy easily recognizing the banter as teasing.    
“Road Runner is a classic,” Blake stated as a matter of factly, seemingly unaffected by the taunt. Jayden’s face fell from disappointment, his brain stumbling over what to say next.  
“He’s right,” a voice chirped from the seat between them, “how old are you anyway, Mr. Blake? You look like a grandpa.”

Jayden held onto the coffee table hard enough to cause it to shake in rhythm with his laughter. Blake was looking at Shaun with a tight tension in his face, the boy starring back with an expression equally devoid of emotion. The staring contest continued between the two until Jayden’s laughter eventually faded out. As he leaned back in his couch expectantly he wasn’t quite sure which of the two he should feel sorry for. Blake’s temper against Ethan’s fatherly rage was sure to be quite a fight.

Shaun grunted sharply through his nose, an odd sound coming from someone so young, and Blake’s jaw quirked. Then they both threw their heads back and laughed, the lieutenant throwing an arm around Shaun’s shoulders and holding the kid in place as he used his knuckles to make a mess of Shaun’s brown hair. Jayden felt somewhat entranced by the sight. He wasn’t sure what he had expected, but it certainly hadn’t been this. _No good with children, Carter? My ass._ Warmth settled in his chest as he kept watching them interact. Again the image of Blake surrounded by children of his own entered Jayden’s mind. It was odd, but… Perhaps not as far fetched as it seemed. Blake certainly never stopped surprising him, that was for sure. He would have to rewrite the profile on him yet again once Blake was asleep.

Jayden turned back into the their conversation near the end of it, just catching the last bit of Shaun challenging Blake and the man agreeing. Curious he was about to ask what exactly they were going to compete in, but a cold shiver rushed down his spine as they both rushed towards their coats and boots. Thus began “The Snowball Fight of the Century”.

 

*

He would have liked to claim that he did well. This wasn’t the case. Between Shaun’s surprising talent for stealth and Blake’s practiced aim he found himself quickly covered in snow and shivering. Taking pity on the agent Shaun decided to switch teams, and although the boy’s presence did make the fight a bit more even, it still ended up with a one on one between the child and Blake. Feeling simultaneously entertained and ashamed of his own poor performance, Jayden slowly crept along the edge of the garden. While he could not participate in the epic battle, there were other ways that he could help Shaun win.

Sneaking through the garden proved to be surprisingly easy, long as he made sure to go slow. He could hear the shared laughter of the last two fighters to his left as he dove behind bushes and snuck along the fence. The shared garden behind the apartment complex wasn’t large by any means. The upper part had been utilized as a sort of dinner area with lots of wooden benches while the lower, where the current battle for fame and glory was raging, seemed little more than a cluster of various fruit trees. Jayden imagined that it would all be quite nice during the summer, but for now it only served as cover as he circled around the place Blake had chosen as his vantage point.  
The snow cackled underneath his boots. A piece of snow slid from his beanie and into the inside of his jacket, caressing his neck wetly as it melted. The cold created a sickly sensation in his body, pleasure and pain mixing to a liquid unpleasantness that made him shudder. He continued his slow approach, throwing himself against the side of the building for cover.  
He felt a childish sensation of giddiness; his nerve ends tickling with excitement from the challenge of remaining unseen.

Leaning forwards slightly he spotted Blake about a hundred feet from him, ducking behind a hill of quickly gathered snow that served as cover. The fight had come to an impasse, it seemed, both fighters staying in their respective trenches. They both slung the occasional snow ball towards the other, but judging by the muffled sounds of taunting, the battle had turned into a struggle of wits for the time being. This wasn’t going to make him job any easier... Unless he was grossly overthinking the whole thing. 

Weighing his options he waited for the next time Blake turned around to shout across the empty one-man’s land, the chilly air piercing his ears as he resolutely pushed himself off the wall and rushed the lieutenant.  
They impacted with a heavy thud, warm breath hitting Jayden’s face as Blake turned around just before they collided.  
“Fuck!”  
The world turned upside down as they tumbled, a loud, victorious howl piercing the air. For a second nothing else but the weight and feel of Blake’s body against his own existed, but then a wave of fluffy white was pushed onto the both of them like a lavine.  
“I did it! I beat both of you,” Shaun giggled, throwing his own body down on top of the pile of adults and snow. “You owe the cussing jar a nickel, Mr. Blake.”  
“Hah, good on you kiddo! I would have gotten ya if Mr. Jayden here hadn’t decided to tackle me. I should have known the two of you were gonna play dirty.”  
“In love and war,” Jayden added pushing against the snow until he was able to sit back up.  
“Exactly,” Shaun nodded, the child looking nearly intolerably smug. The look only lasted until Blake pulled him down into the snow. “Hehe, can we make hot chocolate? I know where dad hid some of the candy for tomorrow.”

 

*

As they walked around the building and snuck inside, Blake grabbed a hold of Jayden’s hand and held him back. He remained silent until Shaun had gone up a floor above them, before he roughly pushed Jayden up against the wall, sealing their lips in an eager kiss.  
“Nice try, FBI, but next time try not to be so obvious.”

 


	12. Nurse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggested by deviantlyfbi  
> Word: Nurse  
> Tags for this chapter: Alcohol, getting drunk, Jayden is a horny drunk, bad humor, Jayden's accent, disgustingly fluffy, love declarations
> 
> Ahhhhh first time writing one of your suggestions and I'm excited!  
> The scene for this chapter was suggested by deviantlyfbi - Thank you so much for the idea! I know that I changed a few things around, but I hope that you'll enjoy this either way (and forgive me) <3 
> 
> On a more serious note tho:  
> I am very sorry that my updates have been rather irregular as of late. The truth is that the last chapter frustrated me to no end, and now I seem to be stuck in a kind of loop where I keep going over it again and again in my mind, pointing out everything that just do not work and- Urgh! So yeah; it's been kinda tough to keep myself focused (ノ﹏ヽ)  
> Hopefully it'll get better tho - If nothing else I might go back and delete the 11th chapter, just to get it out of my mind (☆>⊇<)
> 
> As always; I live for suggestions (and just love for these two in general) so don't hold back! <3

 

 **NURSE**  (Part 1)

 

Blake wasn’t surprised when Jayden rather promptly declined the invitation to join their colleagues for a drink after work. It had been months by now, but the agent seemed as socially awkward and communicatively incompetent as ever. Sometimes it was difficult for him not to laugh out loud at Jayden’s clumsy attempts at small talk; the kid was clearly nervous and overly polite to the point where he came across as mocking and indifferent. Of course he now knew that this wasn’t on purpose and that the younger man was actually _trying_ to form something akin to a working relationship. That being said, he couldn’t really fault the other officers when the stretched out silences and the mumbled replies eventually made them feel uncomfortable. He swore the kid had the social skills of a goddamn skunk!

Lately he had noted, however, that Jayden didn’t seem to have any issues when it involved questioning suspects or even talking to the victims of various crimes. His nervousness seemed mostly centered around the people whom he worked with, and whenever he was put on some sort of spotlight. Huffing in amusement he thought back to the interview the poor agent had been forced to do following the OK case. Jayden had looked as if he was about to pass out. Social anxiety would be his best guess, but he wasn’t a brain doctor or any of that shit so what the fuck did he know. The irony of the whole thing wasn’t lost on him either: Of all the people that Jayden could have imprinted on it ended up being the stoic and unfriendly lieutenant who was a- _what the fuck was it again?_ \- a ‘psychopathic asshole’. 

 When the same invitation circled around the station and reached his desk he accepted without a second thought. He noticed the long look Jayden cast in his direction, but he ignored him. It had been god damn ages since he went out for a drink. He used to go rather frequently in the past together with Ash, but that came to a rather abrupt end when Jayden moved in wi- _Crashed_. When Jayden decided to crash at his place, he corrected himself.

Of course Ash knew why he had been distracted as of late, but that didn’t stop his friend from whining and teasing him about it. He loved the fucking bastard but sometimes it was eerily tempting to strangle Ash with his own fist. Besides, he had spent all of his time off with Jayden up to this point, so he deserved to do something for himself. What did it matter to him that the kid was clingy like a bitch in heat? He ignored the way his body twisted at the thought, snuffing out the sensations before he had a change to recognize them. It wasn’t his problem that Jayden was a goddamn nerd who couldn’t socialize.

 

*

They ended up at Maggie’s; a typical hole-in-the-wall kind of establishment with old pinup posters hanging on the brick walls and old-school rock coming from the speakers. The man behind the bar shot Ash and Blake a look of recognition as they sat down in one of the booths, the rest of the police force settling down at the tables around them. They nearly took up the entire establishment.

It was one of the four places that he and Ash had frequented before, the barman placing two large beers in front of them with a polite nod, before they could even open their mouths to order.  
 “It’s a shame FBI didn’t wanna tag along,” Ash hummed as he stretched, looking very much like the cat that ate the canary. The entire neighborhood’s worth of canaries. Blake took a large gulp of his beer; ready for the teasing that he knew was eminent.  
“I honestly thought the two of you were joined by the hip at this point, especially with all the eye fucking that goes down at the station.”  
“And I honestly thought that you had better things to do than poking around in my private life,” Blake shot back with no real malice behind it. In the background Credence Clearwater asked the patrons of the bar if they had seen the rain.

They continued taking jabs at each other until they were joined in the booth, the conversation flowing idly as the officers drank and laughed. Blake leaned back against the wall, feeling more content than he remembered feeling in a long time. Jayden had an uncanny ability to somehow always make him riled up. ‘I'm gonna give ya every inch of my love’ sounded from the speaker somewhere to his right, the heavy guitar swaying back and forth along with Robert Plant’s vocals.  It was a shame the agent hadn’t joined them.

He had been… dating? That didn’t really sound right. ‘Fucking’ didn’t work either. As Led Zeppelin continued to have verbal sex with the listener, he came to the conclusion that perhaps what he and Jayden had going on just didn’t really need or fit any kind of label. He had thought that having Jayden as something close to a constant in his life would grow old really fast, but somehow he found himself still wanting more. It was infuriating. If this was how it felt to be in love he hated it.

  
He had lost his sense of time when rapid mumbling broke out between his colleagues. The buzzing of sudden energy around him stirred his curiosity, bringing him out of the conversation he was currently having with Charlene. Turning around he nearly dropped what was left of his beer onto the floor. In the open door stood Jayden. A very drunk Jayden.

“Thaha yah guys are!” the younger man slurred with a wide grin, practically _skipping_ up and joining them at the table.  
“Jayden what the hell are you-“  
“I didn’t knauw which bah yah went to, so I sta’ted with… with… I can’t rememba what it’s called… the bah closest to the station and I went from thahe.”  
“You’ve gone to every bar between here and the station?! Jesus kid, no wonder you are completely shitfaced.”  
“I knauw,” he mumbled, a serious frown forming on his face. “Thahe are so many nice people in this cidee. I felt bad saying nau, but then I went to more bahs and thahe were more nice people and they all wanted to drink and- and- I missed yah.”  
“Fuckin- Come on!” He pushed against Jayden’s side until he managed to force the agent to scoot out of the booth, standing up and reaching for the other to steady him. Jayden, however, clearly mistook the action as the younger man eagerly wrapped his arms around Blake’s midsection. A few of the officers at the table behind them, including Ash, broke down into a laugh.  
“Holy fuckin-“  
“Blake and Jayden are getting along! I never thought I would see the day.”  
“D’aww cuddles for the lieutenant, how cuuuuuttteeee.”  
“Ahaha- I didn’t think Mr. big agent could get any more awkward!”  
“HA! Maybe we should just make sure to get Jayden drunk every day.”

Blake growled in annoyance and firmly pushed the agent’s grabby hands away. He ignored the pout on Jayden’s face in favor of stalking up to the bar, ordering the largest glass of water possible. As usual Jayden followed right on his heels like a goddamn puppy. Though at least in this stage he didn’t have to argue with the kid when he ordered him to sit down.  
“What the hell are you even doing here?” he groaned, rubbing his forehead in annoyance.  
“I tauld yah al’eady; I missed yah.”  
“Shut the fuck up, Jayden, everyone is right there.”  
“I daun’t ca’e,” Jayden whined, “I’ve thought about yah all day.”  
“Jayden-“  
“You’re ‘eally sexy.”  
Blake nearly stumbled to the floor. “W-What?!”  
“I want yah to fuck me,” Jayden purred, ignoring the water that was placed before him in favor of running his eyes up and down the length of Blake’s body hungrily.

 _Shit._ _Jayden’s a horny drunk_. The discovery would have been absolutely hilarious if it wasn’t for the group of eyes currently still fixed on them. Blake praised whatever entity might fill the role of god, if one such entity existed, that they were out of earshot.

 Jayden apparently took his silence as approval; “please waun’t yah fuck me? I want yah to bend me ovah the caouch and fuck me ‘aw,” he moaned shamelessly, getting back up from his chair and pressing himself against Blake’s front. He felt the agent’s breath against his neck, a prickly sensation settling in his twitching fingers.

He imagined himself seizing the slim hips, fingers digging into Jayden’s skin as he manhandled the younger up onto the counter. In his mind Jayden’s pants were already hanging off his right leg, his lower body exposed and tights hanging open. He would whimper as Blake thrusted inside of his warm body, the needy hole practically dripping with want already. Everyone in the bar would fall silent eyes drawn to them as he fucked Jayden into the polished wood.

They would all see. See how Jayden sobbed from pleasure, sweet words and desperate begging falling from his lips. They would see how Blake fucked him in two, see how he toyed with and dominated the younger’s body. Half the bar would be salivating for a taste of his cock, while the other would desire Jayden’s writhing body; and they would all know that they could have neither. The thought made him hiss through his teeth, his lower body tight with want.

Clearing his throat he opened his eyelids, unsure when exactly he had even closed them to being with. Focusing in on the abandoned glass of water, he gently pushed Jayden back into the chair, sitting down next to him. He had to get his thoughts under control. While Jayden throwing himself at him like this did wonders to his ego, it was hardly fair to allow the kid to embarrass himself, and Blake, in front of their colleagues. After all Blake knew full well how hard Jayden worked to appear professional, even if he didn’t understand the metrosexual bullshit. Oh well, whatever. He wanted to save Jayden’s pride and so he was going to – Fucking sue him.

“Tell you what,” he said lowly, letting his voice drip with sexual desire. He felt a pang of pride when it made Jayden’s entire body shiver. “If you drink a couple glasses of water, then I’ll take you home. Sounds good?” He deliberately didn’t mention how he planned on forcing the other to go to bed and sleep the moment they returned home, but he figured the agent didn’t need to know that. Jayden could fill in the blank himself, and well; if his drunken mind ended up being wrong, he couldn’t really do much about it in his current state anyway.

His bluff seemed to pay off as Jayden swallowed thickly, quickly turning towards the glass and downing its contents in eager gulps. Blake kept a steady stream of water coming, until Jayden seemed to have calmed down a bit, idly sipping his fourth glass of water with a goofy, far-away smile on his face. There was a melancholic sort of beauty to the other male, as he sat like this, despite the grin on his face. The dark colors under his eyes made him look gentle and sorrowful in a way that Blake could only describe as _soft_.

A young woman made her way to the bar, humming to herself along with the music. The song rose into a chores her hips swaying in rhythm to the fierce guitar as she waited for her beer. She was blond, had a cute, round face and the oversized sweater she used as a dress came to a halt so far up her tights that Blake, who had shifted his gaze to look at her for a brief moment, halfheartedly wondered if he could arrest her for public indecency.

“Cartah,” Jayden whined in a whisper, pushing the glass of water away from him, “I wanna go home.”  
“I know. Drink the rest of the water and we’ll go, okay?”

  
“Oh? Are you okay, sweetie? You are really pale!” The woman cut through the music, reaching beyond Blake and placing a hand against Jayden’s forehead. The agent twitched at the contact.  
“Don’t worry he’ll be fine,” Blake shrugged, placing the glass of water in front of Jayden again, satisfied when the younger went back to drinking, “he just needs to sober up a bit.”  
The woman giggled softly, drawing his attention back to her. “You are really sweet, taking care of him like this. I like that. What’s your name?”  
“Carter.” He shifted on his feet, feeling unsure. A few months ago he would have jumped at this opportunity. Hell, he would probably already be halfway home by now with her sitting in his lap as he drove. Now though…

The girl was tempting as fuck, he couldn’t lie, but the usual surge in his body, the predatory satisfaction at having lured her in, didn’t come.  
“Carter,” fell from her lips in perfectly pronounced English. She repeated it once more, slowly, as if she was trying to taste the name in her mouth. “I’m Charlotte, but you can call me Lottie if you want.”  
“Leave him aloune,” Jayden slurred, still holding the glass of water to his lips. His words drowned in the water, making them impossible to understand.

“You want a drink Lottie?” he asked out of reflex, immediately regretting the included offer in the question. Charlotte flashed him a shy smile, biting her lower lip. She was one of those women who were well aware of how hot she was; every movement and look deliberately drawing attention to her mouth and hips.

She sat down in the bar chair next to him, sitting close enough for their legs to brush against each other.  
“No!” Jayden yelled, slamming his now empty glass into the counter. In a fluid motion the younger man had swung himself onto the floor and pulled Blake from his chair. Blake wasn’t sure what was most impressive; the fact that the kid made the stunt without falling over his own legs, or the sudden force he was displaying.  
“Go away, you can’t have him.”  
  
There was a beat of silence before Charlotte started laughing. “My! Seems like your friend doesn’t like me stealing the attention of his nurse.” Blake’s throat was dry, starring down at Jayden who clutched his arm to his chest. “I can’t really blame him though,” Charlotte continued. Half a year ago her aggressiveness would have been fucking hot, but now all it did was make something unpleasant wiggle in his chest.  

A low rumble sounded from Jayden as he starred at the woman, cheeks puffed out like a little child. Sighing deeply Blake gathered himself, a deep exhaustion settling in his bones.  
“Listen. I’m sure you’re a really nice girl and all, and normally I wouldn’t say no, but I’m-“  
The breath was sucked from his lungs, all sounds dying in his throat and his mind pulled into a numbing haze. Jayden had grabbed a handful of his hair and forced their lips together.

He registered the gasps and wolf whistles that broke out among the other officers, knowing that he should care about it but finding it so hard to find the two shits to give about it. “My dreams aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be,” Pete Townshend sang, the remaining members of The Who following along with their instruments.  

“Yah red,” Jayden giggled once they pulled away for air. He didn’t need the agent to tell him, the warmth in his face enough evidence of the fact. Looking over Jayden’s shoulder, he was met with wide grins. Charlotte had thankfully disappeared.

The weight of the other man against him became heavier, the sensation causing an unfamiliar feeling of rightness. It was different from the satisfaction of getting a criminal locked up, but it was the closest he could really get to a description, his protective instincts flaring as well. Looking down a mistakenly warm smile came across his face as opposed to the annoyed one he had been trying to conjure. Jayden had closed his eyes and was practically sleeping against his chest.

He flipped their colleagues off for good measure as he led the agent out of the bar.

  
*

“How are ya feeling?” he asked as he sat on the edge of the bed, placing a glass of water on the nightstand. Jayden was bundled up underneath the duvets, wearing one of Blake’s old T-shirts. It suited the younger man better than it had ever done him.  
“Bedda,” mumbled Jayden. He had pulled the soft pile of covers all the way up to under his nose. Shit, he was too fucking adorable like this. “You have seen me bahf a lot auf times,” he added with a whine, clearly embarrassed about how they were forced to stop twice on their way home, because Jayden’s body denied playing along with the alcohol anymore.  
“You are pretty fucking disgusting,” Blake huffed in amusement, hesitating for a bit before he stroked a lock of hair away from Jayden’s forehead. “Get some sleep now. You’ll have a hell of a headache tomorrow.”  
The “aukay” he received as a reply was obstructed by a yawn, the agent already on the very edge. “I love you.”

Blake froze in the doorway, his entire body tense like a tightrope. There was no way he could have heard that right. Dumbstruck he remained by the door, looking back at the sleeping form. Jayden was snoring lightly. _Love._ He knew that he was probably in love, but- Did he even know how?  
His chest tightened to the point where it became painful. “I love you too.”      

 


	13. Gluttony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word: Gluttony   
> Tags: Very light angst, fluff, hurt/comfort (kinda), smut, dom/sub, rough sex, oh dear that is a lot of smut
> 
> I... I can't believe I wrote this (/ω＼)  
> This is a continuation of a sort of chapter 12! I am still new at writing actual smut, so this might be a mess, but I really hope that you'll enjoy it regardless! ❤️
> 
>  
> 
> As always: FLOOD ME WITH SUGGESTIONS! I love sharing the love for these two C:

**GLUTTONY  
(Nurse Part 2)**

 

The first thing he registered as he began to stir was the dull aching in his back. He stretched along the worn leather fabric, his muscles crackling as they shifted into place.

Blake had opted to sleep on the couch that night. He had circled around the closed bedroom door several times but for some reason he couldn’t define it proved a struggle to simply open the door and go to sleep. He told himself that he just didn’t want to disturb the kid: Jayden was going to wake up with a hell of a hangover, that much was certain, and Blake was simply sparing himself from having to listen to him whining first thing in the morning. 

As his consciousness grew steadier and his awareness returned, he decided to keep his eyes closed: He could already tell by the blue tint on the inside of his eyelids that it had to be sometime in the early morning. Instinctively he listened for any sounds through the house, disappointed when all that greeted him was silence. Jayden had to still be asleep then.

 

The agent’s voice kept repeating itself in his head: _‘I love you’_.

It was the alcohol talking, he knew that, but something clenched so painfully in his chest it was growing near unbearable.

 He had told Jayden that he loved him too. _Fuck._

 

His right leg began to twitch rapidly as a prickly sensation grew underneath the surface of his skin. Stubbornly he turned onto his side in protest, refusing to acknowledge the growing restlessness within him. He hadn’t had nearly enough to drink to deal with this kind of shit. The notion filled him with a small burst of energy. Today was Saturday after all, and he had the day off.

Standing from the couch and rolling his head from side to side he realized that he had forgotten to take his clothes off before falling asleep. He kept idly massaging the back of his neck in an effort to alleviate some of the tension, as he stumbled into the small kitchen and rummaged through the cupboards.  He found the scotch stashed away in the very back, huffing as he brought forth the bottle and unscrewed the cap.

For a time he allowed himself to lean against the kitchen counter, taking in the stillness of the morning around him with the bottle raised halfway to his lips. The liquor burned comforting on its way down his throat. It worked to clear his mind slightly. He usually wasn’t one to seek comfort at the bottom of a bottle; his upbringing had rooted a dislike for drunkards and in general he had little respect for anyone who couldn’t hold their own. This particular morning however, seemed to be the golden exception. What a fucking night it had been.

He lost track of time as he stood there until the soft thump of a door closing and the sound of running water called him back. Jayden was in the shower. He pushed the bottle into the far corner once again, turning his attention to the coffee machine. For some reason he disliked the idea of Jayden finding him like some sad slob in the middle of his kitchen drinking at fuck o’clock in the morning.   


*  


He burned the toast on purpose to make a statement. What exactly he was trying to express he honestly wasn’t sure, but for some reason the angry, black spots on the surface of the light brown bread just seemed _right_. He deduced that it was a mistake for the sake of a mistake; something that had to be done on principle. Whatever the fuck that meant. Feeling agitated, he not as much placed as he slammed the coffee mugs down onto the countertop, a soft sound following the impact as Jayden entered the kitchen at the same time.  

“Hi.”  
“Hi.” Despite having taken a shower earlier, Blake noted that Jayden had thrown his old t-shirt back on. _Like a girl stealing her boyfriend’s hoodies_. He nearly choked on air at the thought, averting his gaze and feigning concentration as he poured coffee into his mug.

It was a typical ceramic cup; black and with the words ‘I would be sorry but I just don’t give a shit’ written on the side in yellow letters. It had been a gift, though he couldn’t remember who it was from anymore. Blake cursed when the coffee overflowed, running down the edges and forming a goddamn _fucking ocean_ underneath the mug. He heard Jayden chuckle behind him, though the agent wisely kept from commenting. The whole thing seemed oddly familiar on the surface, though the heavy tension between them constantly threatened to burst at every word and movement. It was making the restless feeling flare up again, Blake’s skin crawling and prickling with the need to act. The palms of his hands were gradually becoming slick with sweat. He wrinkled his nose in disgust, reaching for a tissue to clean up the mess he had created.

Jayden ended up being faster than him, however, a hand speeding past his own and letting the thin paper soak up the liquid on the counter. Blake cursed inwardly when he made the mistake of looking up at the younger man. The inch Jayden had on him in height was apparent as they stood like this, and though Blake normally hated having to look up no matter the circumstances, he might as well have fallen to his knees. _Fuck he was pretty._ All it took was for Jayden to turn his head and meet his gaze for the bubble to break around them.

 

He pulled Jayden flush against his chest and claimed his lips. The surge of want made the kiss messy and rough; teeth clattering briefly before their tongues twisted together. Mint from Jayden’s toothpaste mixed with the taste of coffee, forcing a deep groan from Blake. He nipped at the agent’s lips until they were oversensitive, feeling fingers twist into his hair and pulling him closer still to the younger man. Eventually they had to break apart, panting and gasping as they shared a breath. 

“Cartah,” Jayden wheezed, another wave of arousal clashing between them. Blake buried his face in the agent’s unruly locks, the familiar scent of chamomile stroking along his features.   
“Why do you always smell so good?” he mumbled against the strands of hair. He felt Jayden’s cheek heat up against his chin. The kid was so cute when he got embarrassed.   
“I-I,” Jayden stammered, hands pushing weakly against Blake’s chest. It remained unspoken, but both men knew that if the younger really wanted to push him away, Blake would let go. He wasn’t putting nearly enough strength behind the push for it to be more than a norm that needed to be met; a refusal to submit just so the younger could later tell himself that he did try to pull back. It made Blake’s fingers dig further into Jayden’s waist. He hated that Jayden felt like he had to at least pretend to refuse.

He realized how hypocritical that probably made him sound, but he didn’t care. He may be feeling light headed at the other’s drunken declaration of love, he may be unsure exactly how he felt for the younger male, and he may be _emotionally inarticulate_ , as Jayden would probably say, but that didn’t change the fact that if one thing was clear through all the hazy confusion, it was how much he _wanted_ Jayden. How much he wanted to keep the other man _safe_.    

Staying put with his nose in Jayden’s hair, he allowed his hands to wander, squeezing the agent’s hips. He loved when Jayden was like this; hair un-styled, wearing normal clothes instead of his suit, looking so content and _domestic_ and-   
“My head keeps pounding,” the younger whispered, hot breath against Blake’s throat. It caused him to swallow dryly. “What even happened last night? I don’t remember most of it.”

 

If Blake truly had a heart somewhere inside of his chest, he felt it sink to the very bottom of his soul. “You don’t remember?” he asked, trying and clearly failing to keep the disappointment out of his voice.   
“Only bits and pieces. I vaguely remember finding you and the others, and I think you made me drink a glass of water?”   
“Nothing else?”  
“No… Why? What happened?”   
“Nothing really,” he sighed, letting his arms slip from around the other. The air between them shifted once again; desire being replaced by confusion and hesitation. Blake turned his attention back to his coffee, taking a long sip despite the strong brew having gone cold. It tasted like shit. He swallowed it anyway.

 

He could feel Jayden watching him, knowing without looking that the other would have a disapproving scowl on his face as he tried to read him. Eventually he seemed to give up, however, leaving Blake to his brooding as he poured himself a cup. Blake noted how the younger visibly relaxed once the warm coffee hit his lips.   
“If you won’t tell me, then I’ll just have to guess,” the younger hummed, scrunching up his face in mock thoughtfulness. “I was pretty drunk, so… Did I start singing? Dancing? … Shit, please tell me I didn’t pass out?”  
Blake shot the other man an unimpressed glare. The good mood he had been in before having been mostly snuffed out. He had told himself that Jayden didn’t mean what he said that night; that it was caused by liquor and nothing else but to know that the younger did in fact not remember made him feel… _Flat_.

Why was he even reacting like this? What was he disappointed about?! He might have said that he loved Jayden back, but he wasn’t even sure if he actually did. So, really, this alcohol-induced amnesia was the best outcome he could have hoped for.

“Carter?” Jayden’s voice brushed against the top of his ear, the heat radiating from the agent’s body making his own shiver in anticipation. “What happened last night?”  
Blake felt like he couldn’t breathe. Looking back, he really should have known that the younger man wouldn’t let the question go; the agent was nothing if not stubborn. He chastised himself for being so far gone in his thoughts that he didn’t notice Jayden moving to stand close to him.

The air around them had grown heavy once again. Blake couldn’t remember having ever felt like this with anybody before. He had had his share of both relationships and one night stands, but nothing had ever come close to the desire and _want_ he felt when Jayden was close. A burning sensation settled in his lungs. It was like no matter how much air he swallowed down, it wasn’t enough.   

 

They nearly fell over each other as they shifted, lips caressing and connecting feverishly. How they didn’t end up on the floor remained a mystery, a shared sigh slipping between their lips as Jayden finally straddled him.    
“You stumbled around like a drunk toddler and made a fool of yourself,” Blake couldn’t keep his hands from roaming, caressing every inch of skin within reach, “so I took you home.”   
Jayden huffed softly in amusement, wrapping his arms around Blake’s neck and pulling him closer. Their lips kept meeting and parting in a desperate, teasing dance. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

Jayden’s tights against his own felt warm, soft skin sliding against his knees. The lack of friction caused Blake’s breath to hitch. A coy smirk spread on Jayden’s lips. The kid was wearing one of his old t-shirts; the fabric falling off one shoulder as he shifted against him again, but what he hadn’t realized at first, was that the agent was in fact _only_ wearing the t-shirt. He grabbed the nape of Jayden’s neck, pulling him back into a raw, open-mouthed kiss.

The way Jayden moved his lips against his; sensual, languid motions were making him feel dizzy with want. If he was to ever form an addiction to anything, it would be those soft lips against his own. He deepened the kiss, exploring the agent’s mouth thoroughly and growling in approval as he drew a low moan from Jayden. He could feel the younger man turn to liquid in his arms; body melting and pressing further against him, begging and insistent movements of hips against his groin driving him wild. He bit into Jayden’s exposed shoulder, fingers tugging and tearing at the fabric of the t-shirt. The agent moaned weakly, back arching with a shudder as Blake guided the younger’s hips down against his own harder. 

“C-Carter I- haaaah-”   
“What do you want Norman?” He chuckled in a hoarse voice, amusement warring with desire. He felt the soft skin of Jayden’s tights shiver underneath his touch, hands finally reaching behind and groping the agent’s ass. Satisfaction twisted in his abdomen as a shiver ran through Jayden’s body.  
“I want-“ the younger tried to answer, his words sucked into a gasp as one of Blake's index fingers slipped in between the crack of his ass, rubbing at his entrance. He felt it pucker under his touch, already slightly slick.   
“What? I couldn’t hear ya,” he rasped, kissing a wet trail along Jayden’s clavicle.  
“Fuck Carter-! Don't tease-  _ah!_ ”   
“But I love the face you make when I touch you like this,” he growled against his skin, his own erection pulsing. Jayden was fucking gorgeous; messy hair curling against his forehead, his face covered in a blush that bled onto his neck, mouth hanging slightly open and eyes so deep with want that he felt like he was being devoured from the gaze alone.   
“Fuck me!” He might as well have been punched straight in the gut; Jayden’s demanding words tearing a groan from his lips.   
“Fuck, Norm! Shit, the bedroom might be too far—”  
“I’ll carry you,” he heard the younger laugh breathlessly, a hand sliding down the front of his pants agonizingly slow. He hissed when Jayden’s hand finally made contact with his groin, the long, delicate fingers squeezing his member.

Blake took immense pride in the surprised little sound Jayden made when the lieutenant grabbed at his ass with both hands, hoisting him up easily. The difference in height made the maneuver somewhat clumsy, but his brute strength made up for it. The tight heat in his lower stomach only grew as the agent wrapped his slender legs around his midsection, causing the younger’s bare cock to slide against the front of his pants. He groaned at the friction, claiming Jayden’s mouth hungrily as he stumbled down the hallway. He couldn’t resist the opportunity to pin Jayden against the wall several times on the way to the bedroom, reveling in the little gasps and soft moans he received as a reward for worshipping the younger male’s neck. Shit, was it possible to get drunk off of noise alone? If so he was definitely wasted beyond belief.

 

Unceremoniously he kicked the bedroom door open, the wood banging against the wall sharply from the force of it. The loud noise seemed dull and muffled in his ears, however, as if he had stuck his head into a bucket of water. He was stuck under water and Jayden was the last air in his oxygen tank. He knew that he should slow down, savor the taste of the agent’s moans, but instead he found himself unable to hold back, desperate in his greedy inhaling of the younger’s moans. 

He practically threw Jayden down onto the bed, watching him bounce off the mattress. The t-shirt had slid up around the other’s ribs, exposing his firm stomach and leaking member. Blake’s mouth watered at the sight. Reaching across the bed he rummaged through the nightstand, his search halting as he felt Jayden struggling to undo his belt.   
“Eager,” he growled from the very back of his throat, groaning in want as his hand finally made contact with the bottle of lube.

He wasted no time leaning back up from the bed, grabbing Jayden by the ankles and pulling him roughly down towards him at the edge. The agent was already panting softly in anticipation, his feet now dangling off the side of the bed, a few inches from the floor.

His grip on the younger’s wrists ended up being more forceful than he had originally intended. Guiding the smaller hands downwards he placed them against the agent’s member and underneath his balls, urging the other to touch himself. He felt the shudder that rushed through the warm body underneath his, the craving in his body that had laid dormant since the night before making him dizzy as it flared.

He bit into Jayden lower lip, slowly making his way down his throat before finally sucking into the sensitive spot where neck met shoulder.   
“Hurry up,” he commanded, another rush of pride filled satisfaction hitting him as Jayden nodded breathlessly. He had to hold back the urge to laugh as the agent feverishly grabbed for the lube, eagerly plunging two lubed-up fingers into himself. The blush deepened on Jayden’s cheeks, the soft red a stark contrast to his pale skin, as he hurriedly sank his own fingers into his core.    

 

Rucking the t-shirt up under Jayden’s chin, Blake dipped down and took a nipple into his mouth, tonguing at it messily in lazy strokes while he pressed his fingers into the slight dips in Jayden’s hips and squeezed.    
“Ready?” he asked hoarsely, only feeling slightly bad for not giving the younger man more time to prepare. Jiminy Cricket thankfully stopped bugging him quickly, as he noted how Jayden’s cock throbbed at his question. _Filthy minx_. But it wasn’t enough just seeing it, he had to hear it too. He brought his attention to the other nipple, sucking on the hard nub before grazing it with his teeth.  
 That seemed to wake Jayden up, a loud gasp spilling from his lips as he nodded in a jerky motion: “Y-Yes. Ready.”

He leaned back away from the other male, taking in his disheveled appearance as he undid his belt buckle. Jayden shivered under his gaze, the younger sitting up and pawing at Blake’s shirt stubbornly. “Take this off,” he said impatiently, pulling the shirt free from Blake’s pants, “I-I want to feel you.”   
“Only if you behave,” he growled darkly, tearing his shirt off his body regardless.

The shirt was rather quickly accompanied on the floor by his pants, the duvet shoved out of the way and hanging limply off the side of the bed. Jayden reached up to yank the t-shirt over his head but Blake stopped him.   
“Leave it on…?” He hadn’t meant to say it like a question. Seeing Jayden wearing his clothes right now- _shit_ , it did things to him. He felt dazed with excitement, searing warmth coiling in his gut. He didn’t wait for a reply before he reached for the lube again, squirting some into his palm and coating his member.

 He heard Jayden whimper underneath him, a taunting remark ready on his tongue only for it to die as soon as he lifted his gaze. Jayden had turned around onto his belly, ass sticking alluringly into the air. Blake shivered as the last tiny bit of restraint he still possessed completely shattered.

The tight heat ate him up as he thrusted inside. A weak huff was forced from his lips as he went as deep as possible, hips pulling back slightly and thrusting back inside shallowly before he could stop himself. Jayden whimpered and gasped underneath him, entire body quivering with want. The sounds alone made it so difficult to keep still, but Blake forced himself to breathe slowly letting his hands roam along the small of Jayden’s back.

  
“C-Cartah, please,” Jayden slurred after a few seconds of adjusting, voice slightly high pitched and uncharacteristically vulnerable. Blake felt as if his body practically screamed.  
“So fucking eager for it, aren’t you?” he chuckled darkly, amusement clear in his tone. He didn’t give the younger man time to reply before he pulled his hips back, using his grip on Jayden’s hips as leverage as he plunged back into him harshly.   
Jayden croaked through something close to a _cry_ , the sound somewhere between a sob and a moan: “Fuck…!”  
 “Such a good boy,” Blake groaned breathlessly, establishing a brutal pace that had Jayden’s body rocking back and forth against the sheets, “shit, Norm, the sounds you make…-!”

He shifted, pulling his hips back once more until he had nearly withdrawn completely. Experimentally he changed the angle, replying on instinct more than memory at this point to find the right angle. As he shoved himself back inside, his cock dragged over Jayden’s prostate drawing a broken scream from the agent. It made a surge of pleasure and dominance settling in his abdomen, strengthening the already roaring fire within his skin. The feeling bubbled in his chest as he began to laugh, voice low and possessive, as he fucked into Jayden ruthlessly over and over.   
“Yes! Ah, yes, f-fuck me,” Jayden whimpered brokenly, shoulders trembling and mouth hanging open in a shamelessly filthy display of pleasure. _Shit if the kid could hear himself_.

It had been a fleeting idea in the heat of the moment, but now it seemed to take root in the back of Blake’s mind. Jayden was only ever this shameless, this filthy, when his cock was buried inside of him; the agent would probably be near shamed to death if Blake recorded him right now and forced the younger to listen to himself while they were at work.  A wide grin spread on his lips.

He clutched Jayden’s hips even tighter, fingers digging into his skin harder and harder until he was snapping Jayden’s body onto his cock like a toy. Jayden’s body grew tight underneath him, shudders wrecking his body over and over as his moans sped up.   
“You feel so good!"  
"Y-You too- Please, Cartah, I'm so close, please—" Jayden begged.   
“That’s it baby, come for me,” he growled, mesmerized by the sight of Jayden aching his back as his body tightened nearly painfully. He didn’t even realize that he had let the endearment slip past his lips.

The agent came with a loud moan, hips jerking and grinding wildly as he came. Blake followed quickly, tensing with a grunt as he buried himself balls deep and flooded the younger’s walls with his come, Jayden kneeing weakly at the feeling of being filled.

 

They collapsed against each other in a sweaty heap, limbs tangled together.

Blake pressed kiss after kiss against the nape of Jayden’s neck as he tried to catch his breath, a tightness spreading once more in his chest as he held the other man close. He wanted to tell Jayden that he loved him.

Scowling at himself he pulled away from the embrace, the agent whining as he withdrew and slipped from his body. Blake watched as a flood of come trickled out of Jayden’s hole, running down his balls and tights. It made his spend cock twitch in interest, despite the tiredness that settled in his bones. Jayden was shaking as he turned around and nestled against Blake’s chest, Blake wrapping him back up into his arms without hesitation. Their lips meet slowly in long, lazily strokes.  

“Just look at you…” he mumbled thoughtfully, mostly to himself, fingers sliding through brown, unruly strands of soft hair. Jayden looked up at him, gaze holding a silent urge to continue. A lump formed in Blake’s throat.  
“You look like a fucking idiot.”  
For a while the pair of greenish baby blues kept starring at him. Then Jayden grabbed a pillow and threw it against his face.  “Ha. ha. Go fuck yourself, Carter.”  
“It’s okay, Norman. You really weren’t _that_ bad at it.”     



	14. Coffee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to keep you waiting! 🌻  
> Life decided to throw me a curve ball and I suddenly found myself in the hospital. I am okay now, though! Just decided to take a bit of time off to look after myself. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter! It felt amazing to get back into things after so long❤️
> 
>  
> 
> Word: Coffee  
> Tags for this chapter: Angst, uncertainty

 

**Word 14: Coffee**

The light managed to find a breach between the individual panels of the shutters, silently stroking its way into the bedroom. The two sleeping figures on the bed remained undisturbed for a while yet, until the rays managed to creep in further, hitting the younger male in the face.

Jayden shot upright with a startle, climbing on all fours across Blake’s still snoring form to gaze at the alarm clock. It was 10 in the morning. Shit!  
“Cartah! We’re late fah wok,” he whined as he shook the older male, earning no response apart from a grunt of annoyance. Giving up on waking the slumbering beast for now he flung himself up from the bed, the uncovering of his naked skin against the temperature of the room made him visibly shiver. His lower back was sore in an awfully telling way.

Gritting his teeth and stubbornly ignoring the light throbbing, he quickly placed his feet onto the cold floor and located his suitcase. Rummaging through it took him just a bit too long to procure some clean boxers and pants. Normally he would have taken a shower, but they were already several hours late and his inner judge wouldn’t allow for any more delays.  
Jayden was usually an early riser; partly because of a pre-existing tendency towards ‘larkhood’ rather than ‘owlhood’ and partly reinforced by his working hours. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had overslept… or if he ever had.

Mindlessly he looked down at himself as he pulled the pants on, discovering what part of him already knew: Neck, chest, hips, and upper tights, all had been marked by Blake’s fingers and lips. The sight made him feel out of breath.

It took several tries, but eventually his uncoordinated fingers managed to win their fight against his shirt buttons, thankful that the collar of his light blue shirt covered the vast expanse of hickeys and bite marks across his neck and shoulder.  
“Cartah,” he called gently, returning to the side of the bed and giving Blake a slightly too rough shake.  
“Mhmngh fcuk yu w’nt? I’ts too elray,” the man mumbled, the words coming mostly through his nose in a deep huff. Before Jayden had any time to answer, the lieutenant had resolutely turned his back to him, pulling the blankets up above his head.

Unable to resist the urge to roll his eyes, Jayden tried once more to shake the other into compliance. He was completely ignored. “It’s 10 am,” Jayden hissed exasperated, snatching the edge of the blanket and giving it a tug. It didn’t budge a single inch. Tightening his grasp in the soft fabric he tried again. “We’re late for work, now get up!” This time he managing to rip it slightly from Blake’s sleeping form before the lieutenant reached out and yanked it back.

 

*

 

They arrived only 3 hours late, thanks to Jayden’s stubborn persistence. Captain Perry glared at the both of them as they stumbled in through the precinct’s double doors, but surprisingly didn’t pull them into his office for a reprimand.  
Blake hadn’t said a word since that morning, opting for a series of huffs and grunts to get his points across instead. Even for an old, grumpy asshole like him he was being unusually secluded and irritable. Someone might as well have taped a sign with fuck off on his back and the words would still seem inadequate for the greenish cloud of unfriendliness that radiated off of him.  
Jayden debated with himself whether or not to attempt to lighten the other’s sour mood, but in the end he decided against it. He had already been dealing with him all morning and he found himself severely lacking the energy it would demand of him to stick his nose into whatever was bothering Blake. Let someone else stick their head inside of the wasps nest. The thought had barely manifested itself in his mind before Ash sauntered up next to them and did exactly that

“Both of you guys owe me big time,” Ash hummed and handed the lieutenant a grey plastic folder. As usual Ash was completely unaffected by the heavy tension surrounding his friend. Jayden observed with careful eyes how the third male leaned into Blake’s side, both officers remaining quiet and unobtrusive in their mutual, nonverbal show of support. The tension loosening in Blake’s shoulders was visible even from a mile away.

Briefly Jayden wondered if the gesture would have had the same effect, if he had been the one to attempt it rather than Ash. He didn’t allow his mind to fully answer, the instantaneous lean towards a negative making something tight and unpleasant settle in his diaphragm. Mumbling an excuse he retreated to the coffee machine.

Somehow everyone else in the precinct seemed alright with drinking the sour, too thick soup that the machine claimed to be coffee. He had expressed his wonderment to Charlene on several occasions, and while the secretary had laughed jovially the first few times, it became very clear that nothing would be done about it. He supposed it was one of the things that just eventually became less important for most folks, when the real goal was the shot of caffeine that you needed to get through the day. Work in law enforcement often proved unpredictable, and everyone eventually sought refuge in the brief second of calm that the dark brew offered.

That didn’t change the fact, however, that it still tasted like liquid asphalt.

Dryly he noted how the, thick liquid seemed like the perfect metaphor for his morning. Bitterness began swirling within him in tandem with the one in his cup, and despite stretching and rolling his shoulders in an attempt to calm down it seemed to only grow. He wasn’t even sure what was making him feel this on edge, but the nauseating sense of urgency and restlessness reminded him a bit too much of shaking hands and a bleeding nose.

Sighing he placed the warm cup into the trashcan, careful not to tip it over and cause a mess. Not that it mattered; the poor cleaning lady still had about a 90% risk of standing with a leaking trash bag regardless, if he had to make a guess. He balanced the Styrofoam cup against an empty plastic container that had once been the home of some instant noodles.

Once the door to his office fell shut behind him, his heavy body froze in place against the door rather than taking a seat at his desk. His mind felt heavy in a way, slow, but he still carefully went through the events of the past few days. Something was different.

Admittedly his relationship, if it could even really be called that, with Blake had been… Unusual from the very start. Everything had happened so quickly between them, and rather than a slow, mutual attraction it had exploded between them like a dirty bomb and stuck like napalm. It wouldn’t be wrong to claim that they had gone through the steps of a relationship all backwards. Was that what this was about? This uneasy clenching in his chest?

He had long since given up on figuring out the reasons behind Blake’s ever present mood swings, but the older male had seemed even more erratic than usual the past week.

Frustration spread along his spine and manifested itself against his temple. He felt… Annoyed, he realized. Blake was usually rather straight forward, and even if Jayden didn’t fully understand his reasoning, he could deal with the mood swings because the lieutenant was abruptly honest in his demeanour. If he hadn’t spent so much time with the other he would probably have missed it.

It was when they slept together that the change became most apparent. For a time they both lowered their shields and mixed together so easily that it might have been enough to make someone more sensitive than either of them cry.

To begin with it had been messy, rough, a bodily need for satisfaction and lust. Then it had gradually turned slower, more insistent. Deeper. The last month they hadn’t fucked each other like they used to; more and more often they had fitted together in a way that held a scary resemblance to _making love._

Images of the lazy, passionate Saturday morning they had shared came back to him, weak shivers running along his spine. He briefly noticed how his fingers had begun to twitch against the door, the urge to go back outside for another cup of coffee he wouldn’t drink battling his immovable muscles. That morning had seemed important to him, even in his slightly hungover state.

_Just look at you_ , Blake had said and in that moment all Jayden’s blissed out mind had been able to conjure was a repeating chorus of _yes, yes look at me._ He wanted Carter to always look at him with that particular softness on his features. It was something he couldn’t name, something he feared to acknowledge in case he gave himself false hope, but for a moment he had been sure it had been there.

Blake wasn’t a gentle man, hadn’t been in all the time Jayden had known him, but in his own way he had been surprisingly tender. It was in the way he rushed to his side, letting their suspect go because he thought Jayden’s wellbeing was more important. It was in the way he would choke and cough, grumbling under his breath whenever Jayden managed to make him feel embarrassed. It was in the way he had held him close during the stake out at the night club.

That tenderness was gone now.

Blake fucked him last night. In fact, for exactly the past week the lieutenant had fucked him every night. Chewing at his bottom lip Jayden eventually walked back out into the precinct, the restlessness within him wining the tug of war. His eyes immediately went to Blake’s desk, taking in the curve of the lieutenant’s back as he typed away on his computer.

He did not have to swing by Blake’s desk on his way to the coffee machine, but if he did surely nobody would question it. Most of the time they were assigned the same cases, after all, a part of Perry’s “Wonder Team”.

Rather than getting that second cup of coffee, Jayden turned and made his way to the bathroom. Had something happened last week that changed something? He couldn’t remember anything major, and the change seemed to happen more or less over night. Blake had seemed fine all weekend, but then when they returned to work-

It was stupid, though. Blake was an absolute bastard, narcisistic and violent, not to mention straight! No, Jayden couldn’t let himself think of their entanglement as anything more substansial than what it really was. He was Blake’s plaything, entertainment and an outlet until he eventually became tired of having Jayden around.

“You don’t actually believe that, do you?” Looking up he met his own, reflection in the bathroom mirror. He didn’t feel like he was going through withdrawals but he happily accepted it as the reason for the unrest in his chest. Madison had tried to help him find somewhere to live, believing his lie about staying at the motel.

Perhaps it was about high time he actually started looking.

He didn’t realize that he had been standing idly just on the inside of the bathroom door, until a hand was waved in his face.  
“Jayden? Hey, you okay?”  
“Huh?” It took him a long, tense moment to realize that the officer standing in front of him was Jensen, “O-Oh, yeah, I’m fine,” he gasped, sidestepping away from blocking the door with stiff legs.

  
“The Lieutenant giving you a hard time,” Jensen chuckled, his words more a statement than a question. “You did shock all of us with that prank declaration last week, I don’t think I’ve ever seen the old fucker flustered! Ha! Hillarious. Ah, but don’t worry he’ll come around. Things said when drunk and all that. You did get him good, though, the look on his face-“

Jensen continued to have a conversation with himself as he exited the bathroom, leaving Jayden standing awkwardly against the wall. 


End file.
